We survived two rounds of the Real Housewives of New York City reunion, and now there’s just one left to go. So who won the battle of the reunion? Let’s break it down.

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Carole vs. Aviva

Host Andy Cohen asks Carole if she was insulted that Aviva said “At least I’m not 50” at the height of Book Gate. Although Aviva insists it was a compliment, not even the fellow dingbats on her couch can agree that that isn’t the most insulting thing you can say to another woman. Luckily, Carole is confident and secure and still feels hot.

Round 1 goes to: Carole
Aviva is just plain rude. And has she ever apologized to anyone (besides Ramona) in her life?

Aviva vs. Heather

Aviva takes serious issue with Heather’s language, especially when she called her a mother-effer. Aviva insists that this is The Hamptons, not The Hood, and Heather should stop talking like “she’s from the ghetto.” Heather does not appreciate Aviva’s use of the word “ghetto” and she tells her to stop talking about things she doesn’t understand. She thinks she’s perpetuating stereotypes that are obnoxious and ignorant.

Round 2 goes to: Heather
Duh. Holla!

Sonja vs. ???

This is your daily reminder that Sonja Morgan has completely lost it. She claims not to be delusional, all the while saying that she’s paying her $7 million judgment and keeping her house, all while investing in more “opportunities.” She says she can forgive Aviva for being so mean to her last season because she’s a “Christian woman.” Right. A Christian woman who also constantly flashes her coochie on a reality TV show. I’m not judging, I’m just saying.

Round 3 goes to: Sonja’s Nigerian Soccer Team
…Or is it her toaster oven? 

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Aviva vs. Ramona

They may be on the same couch this week, but Ramona ruffles Aviva’s feathers when she tries to get to the bottom of her crazy. After we see a montage of Aviva returning to the barn where she lost her leg, some of the other ladies wonder why they don’t see that more human side of her more often. Ramona wonders, what is it that makes Aviva turn on people? She says there’s a side to Aviva that’s very nice, but there’s also a side of her that can be very vile. Aviva says she responds with anger when people call her vile. And by the way, she doesn’t like being called “vile” by Ramona. Even if they’re friends.

Round 4 goes to: Ramona
Ramona is just trying to speak her truth. She can’t help it that Aviva’s brain is made of the same material as her prosthetic leg.

Kristen vs. Ramona

Ramona’s argument for why she wanted Heather to make up with Aviva is that both she and Heather are the roosters of their groups, and that if one of the roosters was fighting with Aviva, the whole dynamic of the group would be changed (it’s Ramona logic; don’t ask). Kristen takes offense because she thinks Ramona is constantly glossing over her opinions because she’s the new girl. Kristen says the only problem Ramona had with her was that she had something to say. She stands up and sarcastically introduces herself to Ramona: “Hi, I’m Kristen Taekman, nice to meet you.”

Later, Andy asks Ramona and Sonja if they find the fact that Kristen called them her “crazy drunk aunts” insulting. Ramona and Sonja are unaffected because 1) they’re not crazy; 2) they’re not drunks; and 3) they’re not her aunts, they’re her “contemporaries.” To clear things up, Andy asks Kristen if she meant it as a compliment or as a dig. “A dig,” Kristen answers without hesitation. “I’ll own it.”

Round 5 goes to: Kristen
Kristen is not afraid to stand up to Ramona. Not bad for the new girl.

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Aviva vs. Everyone

Aviva looks so freaking pleased with herself as soon as Andy introduces the Leg Gate footage. She admonishes Kristen for looking so horrified upon seeing a prosthetic. She says it’s not something to be grossed out about. Kristen says she was just shocked because she had completely forgotten that Aviva had a prosthetic to begin with.

Aviva claims that she didn’t go to the party with the intention of throwing her leg. She did, however, plan her case with the x-rays and the doctors’ notes. The other ladies call BS, but she insists it only takes her seconds to unbutton her leg.

Round 6 goes to: Aviva
As antagonistic (and irrational) as she may be, Leg Gate is truly an iconic moment on the Real Housewives.

Victor: Heather Thomson!

Even the ladies on the posing couch can agree, when it comes to her family life as well as her social life, Heather is a pillar of strength. Her positive attitude and good sense of humor are infectious. And when someone crosses her, she’ll speak her case eloquently. Or she’ll throw a “mother effer” in there. Whatever the situation calls for. 

(Image courtesy of Bravo)

Gina Pusateri

Contributing Writer, BuddyTV