In this episode of The Real Housewives of Atlanta, “Beauties and the Beat,” Kim plans a brunch to bring the ladies together but winds up offending Kenya. And Cynthia focuses her attention on taking her eyewear line to the next level and turns to two of the ladies for help.
After attending a series of semi-disastrous events thrown by the rest of the ladies, Kim decides to hold her own event: a brunch. She calls upon her good friend/stylist, Victoria, to help her plan her party.
Is NeNe Leakes Returning to RHOA Full Time Next Season? >>>
No Weaves, No Eyelashes, No Service
Kim has a theme in mind, a “beatless” brunch. This means the ladies will go without makeup. Beat may not be the best term, since this is defined as “extremely ugly.” Kim wants to celebrate “the canvas when it’s a little more blank.” In other words, ladies: no lipstick, no blush, no fake eyelashes, just au naturale. This should go over well.
Victoria is certain the women will be down. After all, who hangs out at home in their Louboutins? Cut to Phaedra and Cynthia looking totally fly while just cleaning and hanging out.
Kim sends out the invites via voicemail, and to say the women are less than thrilled would be kind.
And Baby Makes Three
Kandi and Todd are prepping for their impending arrival, and Todd is going the old-school route. He’s not against changing the occasional diaper, but he’s not 100% down with going 50/50 when it comes to the child-rearing responsibilities.
Kandi’s a bit rusty, having been out of the mommy game herself for quite a while, so they call upon a “baby whisperer” to give them some pointers. Kandi plans to breastfeed for three or four months and finds out that this process can actually go on for three or four years. You know what they say, “If they can ask for it, they probably don’t need it.”
Cynthia Builds Her Brand
Cynthia is meeting with her eyewear team, and she’s ready to take things to the next level by making a commercial, and she wants Kim and Kenya to take the reins. Why Cynthia would even consider Kenya after watching “Life Twirls On” is beyond me, but she thinks Kenya has a flair for the dramatic — in a good way — and she is, after all, Cynthia’s girl. And Kimmy’s a pro; she’s got history in front of and behind the camera. Cynthia’s dream is for the two to collaborate and she thinks the ladies would make a dream team; they just don’t know it yet.
Phaedra Moves Forward
Phaedra is finally ready to move forward with the divorce, and the big issue on the table is drafting a parenting plan. Phaedra is still not eager to take the kids to jail, and she’s waiting for the okay from a child psychologist that the boys are ready. Phaedra’s also hoping that Apollo gets moved to a more kid-friendly facility. I’m not sure what’s she’s expecting. A McDonald’s and a bouncy house?
Phaedra and her attorney sit down with Apollo’s lawyer and start discussing terms. Being a jailbird, Apollo’s not in a position to make too many demands. Phaedra is hoping for a swift parting, but Apollo’s lawyer states that it only takes one person to mess up a settlement, and if one person gets unreasonable, all bets are off.
The Real Housewives of Atlanta Recap: Do NeNe and Cynthia Rekindle Their Friendship? >>>
We’ve Got the Beat
The day of Kim’s brunch arrives, and she’s a bit nervous about hosting these high-maintenance ladies. And it looks like she’s got good reason to be. Kandi picks up Kenya, and girlfriend has broken the no-makeup rule. She informs Kandi that she’s a “grown-ass” woman and will do what she likes. Even Kandi didn’t venture out without something to cover up the dark circles under her eyes.
Kenya doesn’t understand why Kim would play “makeup nazi,” and she thinks Kim’s basically telling them she thinks they wear too much.
Phaedra shows up at the door, and she’s not looking beat or beatless or whatever the hell wearing no makeup means. Phaedra says no Southern Belle ever comes “beatless” unless you’re talking about the vegetable. I don’t know if fake lashes technically count as makeup.
Porsha arrives not only with a gallon of crap on her face, but also 10 pounds of extra hair looking like a whacked-out Rapunzel meets Pocahontas.
Cynthia dials things down a notch, but the only one, other than Kim, who really embraced the idea behind the brunch is Sheree, who shows up looking fab and fresh.
Cynthia brings up what is bound to be her worst idea ever — the proposition of Kim and Kenya working together on a commercial for her eyewear line. Kim isn’t big on co-directing, stating that she’s never heard of it being done, but Kenya throws out the Farrelly brothers as an example. Kenya thinks Kim is being pompous and arrogant, and isn’t blown away with Kim’s credentials.
Cynthia wants to do the shoot in Jamaica, so now this little business trip is morphing into a vacay for the ladies and various escorts if they choose.
Tootie pulls out some notebooks and pens, and invites the ladies to write a poem about natural beauty, but Kenya thinks Kim’s a bit of a hypocrite since she’s had multiple boob jobs and has a wig atop her head.
Kenya confronts Kim and says that she took umbrage with Kim’s reminder that makeup is to enhance their beauty. Kenya feels she should be able to present herself however she chooses without commentary from others.
Kim insists that she wasn’t judging anybody; the woman just thought it would be nice if the ladies could lose the red-carpet glamour for one effing meal. How this translates into throwing shade is a mystery to Kim.
It would seem that after the way Kim and Kenya butted heads at the brunch, Cynthia would reconsider her grand scheme to have them work together, but that’s not the case. Kim and Kenya agree to come up with their own ideas and pitch them to Cynthia.
Cynthia meets up with Kim, ready to hear her pitch. All that’s missing is Kenya, but when Cynthia calls to find out Miss Moore’s ETA, she says she won’t be coming. She uses some kind of construction emergency at Moore Manor as an excuse, but we all know that’s a load of BS, as does Cynthia. Cynthia’s pissed that she made time in her busy schedule to appear in “Life Twirls On,” but Kenya doesn’t feel the need to reciprocate.
Cynthia can’t help but be impressed with Kim’s professionalism, but Cynthia’s still determined to get Kim and Kenya’s combined perspectives. And even though Kenya blew her off, Cynthia is going to give Kenya another opportunity to wow her.
When Cynthia questions what role Kim sees herself playing — director or producer — Kimmy makes it clear that she usually does it all. For Kim, there is an ‘I’ in team. Kim is willing to make the client — Cynthia — happy, even if it means playing nice — with Kenya. And Kim’s been in the biz long enough to not turn down work, no matter what it is. This promises to be a bigger disaster than Batman v Superman. Mark my words.
The Real Housewives of Atlanta airs Sundays at 8pm on Bravo.
(Image courtesy of Bravo)