The first part of season 5B of Teen Wolf has been all about the pack being brought back together after the disastrous events of the previous half-season. The first and second episodes were all about Scott and Stiles. The third episode was about Kira and Liam. Now Malia and Lydia are given a turn in the grimy spotlight.
These two ladies are probably my two favorite characters on Teen Wolf and this episode, titled “The Sword and the Spirit,” thankfully does them justice. Plus, Gerard Argent is back in full force, delivering all his lines in a growly, toothy smirk. This episode is just as miserable (in tone) as the whole season. Still, those previously mentioned three factors end up personally making this one of the most entertaining episodes of the entire season so far.
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Argent Family Trip
Gerard and Argent are searching for the Beast in the sewers. Argent is still mostly clueless about what they are hunting and Gerard still really likes saying the Beast’s official name. They trade a series of manly grumbles and split up. Gerard comes face to face with the Dread Doctors. Gerard is the first person in Teen Wolf history to disable the Doctors through some hokey radio crap. Argent, meanwhile, finds a pile of dead bodies covered by devouring insects.
The 23 bodies are taken to the hospital, sending Parrish into a shame spiral as his dreams are coming true. Sheriff tries to get Parrish to calm down and do his job (something he hasn’t done in two years if it’s not directly related to Lydia). Scott, Stiles and Kira show up and theorize that the bodies are connected to the Beast and the Dread Doctors. (Uh, duh!)
Malia Continues her Hunt
Theo continues his sexy terrifying relationship with Malia. Theo wants to inject Malia with something that will make her stronger so she can find her mother. Malia objects but eventually agrees to be experimented on by the sociopath. She’s had smarter moments.
Theo then ties Malia up and puts some weird torture goggles on her in another Dread Doctor surgery room. This is not a misguided scene from a weird fan fiction, but rather a method to find the Desert Wolf. Using a different version of the same hokey radio crap Gerard used earlier, Malia discovers that her mom (and Deaton) are in Beacon Hills.
Beast vs. Hellhound: Dawn of Apocalypse
Malia goes to Liam and tells him about the surgery room so he can inform Scott. Liam doesn’t do that at all. Instead, Liam and his dumb sideburns try to go find the hidden room on his own. Thankfully, Scott stalks Liam the entire way and helps him find the chamber. When Liam starts crying about how much he hurt Scott, Liam inadvertently manages to find the entrance to the chamber.
Scott and Liam walk inside to find Argent and Gerard waiting. Gerard commits fully to the hammy villain dialogue and delivery. It’s so ridiculous and so gloriously entertaining. Gerard takes Scott, Argent and Liam to the “lovely” mural that the Dread Doctors unearthed in the season 5A finale. Argent reveals the rest of the mural. Under the Hellhound and Beast locked in combat, a pile of bodies representing everyone in Beacon Hills is depicted. Later, Gerard and Argent capture Parrish and confirm once and for all that he is the Hellhound in the mural.
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Malia gathers her “troops” of Theo and Braeden. They get ready to storm the location where the Desert Wolf is hiding. Lydia is in her dream world training with Meredith. While there, Lydia receives a vision of Malia in serious trouble from a looming figure. As Lydia watches in horror, she mutters, “She is going to die.”
In the real world, presumably at the same time, Stiles goes to visit Lydia. The scene is all beautiful and touching and yet another perfect example of why these two are meant for each other. Ms. Martin finds Stiles inside the room and not so politely tells him to get the hell out.
As Stiles goes to leave, he sees the shaved patch of hair on Lydia’s scalp. Stiles correctly assumes that they are going to drill a hole into Lydia’s head. Ms. Martin denies and disbelieves the claim. This makes it clear that she’s not aware of Eichen House’s intentions. This isn’t the first time I’ve wanted to ask this question, but the mystery remains. Why in god’s name has Eichen House not been slapped with a million lawsuits and every one of the workers been imprisoned?!
Anyway, back at the evidently ill-fated Deaton rescue mission, Malia, Theo and Braeden find Deaton. Theo proceeds to do what literally everyone was expecting him to do. He betrays Malia. Theo knocks out Braeden and shoots Malia in the side with Braeden’s gun. The Desert Wolf shows up, gives Theo some blue claws and Theo leaves. Theo at least has the “decency” to say he regrets betraying Malia and leaving her for dead.
Lydia is desperate to help Malia in her dreamworld. With Meredith’s help, Lydia wakes up from her coma and screams. The cry reaches Desert Wolf just as she is about to kill Malia. This gives Malia the advantage she needs to get up and fight back. As Malia fights with her mother, we finally catch up to the flash-forward that opened season 5A. Lydia is back to being a super-powered Black Widow and wrecking house at Eichen House.
Plans on Both Sides
The Beast, evidently known for his reliable plot timing, shows up at a break in the fight between Malia and her mother. The Beast goes to take Deaton, forcing Malia to choose between saving his life and attacking her mother. Malia obviously makes the right choice and saves Deaton. Now that Deaton is free and safe, Malia reconciles with Scott. The pack is back together. They gather together to plan Lydia’s escape from Eichen House.
This happy ending is tempered not only by the knowledge that the pack will probably fail to rescue Lydia, but also the return of a familiar evil face. Theo’s pack has captured Deucalion and the blind Alpha agrees to work with Theo. Deucalion just has one condition. He wants the eyes of Scott McCall on his claws. So it looks like the truce between the two Alphas is probably off.
Teen Wolf airs Tuesdays at 9pm on MTV.
(Image courtesy of MTV)