Millionaire Brendan Synnott was blind-sided last week on Survivor: Tocantins, leaving his alliance partner Sierra Reed out in the cold.  The promos for this week’s episode showed Sierra as a sitting duck, a castaway whose fate was more or less sealed.  But, of course, this is Survivor and nothing is ever certain, or at least the editors won’t make it look that way.  Coach Benjamin Wade remains alive and well on Survivor, which means we’re guaranteed a handful of unintentionally hilarious quotes each week.  I’m going to miss that guy.  What follows is a recap of tonight’s events.

Please enjoy.  

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Coming back from tribal council, Sierra is pretty depressed.  She cries, calls it the worst night she’s had the whole time in Brazil.  Somebody’s a drama queen.  “In love and war, it’s kill or be killed,” Coach tells Sierra.  Let’s parse that particular bit of wisdom out – in love, it’s kill or be killed.  Love?  Really, Coach?  What kind of relationships have you been in, sir?  Coach meditates the next morning and gloats about being the Dragon Slayer.  This is difficult to watch.  Coach claims victory and generally acts like a total jackass.  

Sierra is still in shock.  She tries to justify locking in with Brendan, and writing down Coach’s name.  Tyson is a jerk to her when she tries to explain herself.  Tyson straight up says he thinks Sierra is worthless, that probably only her parents love her and that her boyfriend is probably not cool.  Then he tells her in her face that she’s dumb, and that she’s the next to go home.  Well, then.

Reward Challenge

The tribe is split into two teams.  The winning team gets a feast at a local village, where they will treated to a Capoeira performance (Brazilian dance fighting).  Each team member takes turns running out into the woods to untie large boards with various circular holes cut into them.  They have to place the boards into one specific holder.  The four boards line up in a way in which you can look through all four boards, which will reveal a series of vowels that are held up on a series of sticks.  Once the vowels are revealed, they have to flip all the boards around to reveal a series of consonants on the other end of the field.  The letters can then be combined to form a four word phrase (“You’ve won a feast”).  

The red team (Erinn, JT, Debra and Tyson) absolutely destroyed the black team, much to Coach’s chagrin.  They send Stephen to Exile.  The red team enjoys their reward it’s a good-looking spread.  Debra talks about missing her children – both her own, and the middle-schoolers that she’s the principal of.  Then she starts crying – when she sees the kids in the village, she realizes how much she misses the kids back home.  Awww.  Gotta love Debbie.  

Ha ha.  Erinn ate too much and ends up vomiting in the woods and on her feet.  That’s embarrassing.  

Stephen arrives at Exile hoping that since Brendan’s idol is out of the game there will be a new one hidden.  No dice – there is no new idol, and Stephen will spend a couple of days doing absolutely nothing.

Back at Forza, Debra explains to Sierra why she effed up, and why she will now be going home.  The conversation gets a little contentious when Sierra starts acting like a baby, then accuses other people of being liars.  The she talks some smack to Sierra.  Everyone is sick of Sierra.  Erinn is the second person tonight to call her dumb.  Rough.  

Now it’s time for Coach and Sierra to talk.  Sierra wants another chance, and she makes a teary-eyed plea to Coach.  She wants to be trusted again.  Coach acts the compassionate man – he would like to give her a second chance, but he can’t.  He invokes the code of the samurai, and says that she should accept her fate.  She thinks they should take Erinn out next.  This is some exceptionally schmaltzy stuff for Survivor.  Maybe it’s the cheesy music being played in the background.


Immunity Challenge

The rain is coming down hard during immunity.  Good stuff.  Everyone huddles together as Jeff explains today’s challenge.  It’s Survivor Shuffleboard.  Each player gets three pucks.  Whoever’s puck is closest to the X on the board at the end of the game wins immunity.  There is a twist – if anyone feels confident enough in their spot in the game, they can opt not to play in the challenge and eat pizza instead.  Coach, Stephen and JT opt to eat pizza, leaving the door open for Sierra to steal an immunity win.  Tyson gets closest in the first round.  Debbie leads the second round off with a good shot, but Erinn makes a great shot, very close to the X.  Tyson gets bumped by Sierra to take the lead at the end of round 2.  Sierra comes up with a huge shot, knocking Tyson’s pucks out of the way and takes the lead with only Debbie’s final shot remaining.  Debbie comes up big, though, knocking Sierra’s shot away and coming away with the immunity idol victory.  Heart-breaking loss for Sierra. 

Tyson wanted to win for the third time in a row, but he’s OK with the outcome.  He hopes that Sierra cries a lot at tribal council.  Taj, Stephen and Erinn have a talk – they discuss maybe eliminating Tyson now when they have the chance.  Stephen brings up the plan to JT.  He seems up for it, but he also doesn’t really like Sierra.  However, they have the numbers to eliminate Tyson without talking to Sierra or Coach.  JT and Coach have a talk – it’s clear that if JT votes for Tyson, Coach is going to be super-pissed.  

Tribal Council  

Tyson is asked who he loves here in the game – he names everyone except for Sierra.  He’s been a huge dick to Sierra this episode, which makes me like him less.  He says he’s very confident in his place tonight.  Then, it gets into a pissy little argument between Tyson and Sierra.  Just to pile on, Jeff pulls a Simon Cowell on Sierra and says that he has no idea what she’s saying right now.  Jeff has some more fun with Coach when it comes to his world view, Coach explaining his warrior mentality and then calling himself a “ravenous wolf.”

Vote Rundown:

Sierra
Tyson
Sierra
Sierra
Tyson
Tyson
Tyson
Tyson

Tyson Apostol is eliminated from Survivor. Wow, they did it.  The look on Sierra’s face, I believe, is shock.  Same thing with Tyson.  I think we can already call next week’s episode “The Wrath of Coach.”