Tonight Hell’s Kitchen is competing against the Victoria’s Secret Swim Special with guest stars Demi Lovato and Nick Jonas, so it looks like Chef Ramsay is going to pull out all the stops to make sure his viewership stays strong. It looks like our chefs will be equipped with a bow and arrow sometime tonight, you guys. Let’s hope they point it at the target, and not at each other. (I’d be worried about fatalities between Manda and Jackie, especially.)

When we last left the chefs, there was a bit of a switch-up. Chad is now repping the Red Team, and Dannie has been moved over to Blue. “I think Chad on our team will work extremely well,” Kristin says. She has a lot of respect for him, which is good. Hopefully he’ll be able to communicate with the ladies better than he communicated with Jared.

“I look really good in blue,” Dannie jokes, mentioning that every day in Hell’s Kitchen is a complete surprise. Cut to a scene where the chefs walk into the kitchen and see a live bison! Ariel, who’s still on crutches, is especially worried that the bison might decide to charge at her.

Chef Ramsay comes in and introduces the bison who is named Jack. Soon after, Jack decides to pee on the carpet. “At least it’s a number one,” Chef Ramsay says with embarrassment. “For your next challenge, each of you will be cooking a cut of bison. Sorry, Jack.”

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Just Like Robin Hood

The chefs have to walk beside Jack and choose which cut of bison they’re interested in. “When wild animals feel fear, they eat your f*cking face!” Jackie announces. Once the chefs choose their cut and form into pairs, Ramsay reveals a board of flags that represent different food-savvy countries. Each chef will aim a bow and arrow to figure out which country they’ll be representing. Jared and Jackie take a turn, and Jared’s arrow hits closer to the target — thus, he chooses Spain.

Dannie and Ashley are up next, and Ashley chooses Thai. Chad and Amanda compete next, and Chad’s arrow gets super close to the center. Manda has no clue how to shoot an arrow, but still ends up doing better than Chad. She chooses Italy.

Ariel and Joe compete next, and Joe’s arrow doesn’t even hit the bullseye. Ariel goes for Japanese. Finally, Frank and Kristin take their turn. Kristin notes that she’s pretending like she’s Kevin Costner in Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves, and her arrow completely bounces off the board. (No offense, Kevin.) Frank decides that they’ll be cooking French dishes.

The Challenge

The chefs have 40 minutes to prepare a dish using only their cut of bison, and the ingredients from the country they chose. Ashley is feeling extremely confident in her Thai dish, since her two Dads have an Asian restaurant. Speaking of Asian food, Jared has no faith that Joe will have any idea how to cook his meal. 

Jackie decides to cook a Spanish cheeseburger. What’s a Spanish cheeseburger? “I wish I would have gotten Italian,” Jackie moans.

Today, Chef Ramsay will be judging each dish head to head. He starts with the flank steak, picked by Chad and Amanda. “Nailed the protein,” Chef Ramsay exclaims to Chad. Manda’s dish is a grilled flank steak with questionable garnish, thus earning Chad the first point of the night for Red.

The ground bison with Spanish ingredients is next, and it’s Jared versus Jackie. Jared uses chorizo, red wine, and kale in his dish. Jackie changed her burger to meatballs, but unfortunately it’s still a fail — the meatballs are just too dry.

Kristin cooks a beautiful top sirloin, but since Frank’s dish was also comparable, Chef Ramsay awards a point to each. Ariel has a Japanese rib-eye with bok choy that gets an extremely favorable review. Joe uses a daikon radish in his dish, and also gets high praise. Once again, Chef Ramsay awards a point to both, making the score 3-3.

Dannie brings up a grilled bison with bison spring rolls, which are all cooked beautifully. Ashley brings up a pad thai, since she said she was willing to take a risk. Even though it’s weird, it’s delicious. After much consideration, Chef Ramsay decides to give the point to, and then decides — once again — to split the points. 

The Tie-Breaker

Chef Ramsay decides to break the tie by giving a point to the best dish of the challenge, and chooses Chad, scoring a win for the Red Team.

“You’re going to meet some Hollywood actors,” Chef Ramsay says. Supposedly these famous actors were in “We Bought A Zoo.” And, uh — surprise! They’re not hanging with anyone cool, they’re hanging with some animals! To make up for their disappointment, Chef Ramsay also gifts them all blenders. As punishment, the Blue Team will be baking fresh bread for “Cowboy Steak Night.” Also, they’ll have to shampoo the carpet and free it of bison urine.

Lions and Tigers and Bears — Oh My!

The Red Team arrives at Hollywood Animals and meet up with Eric Weld, the owner. He promises a few up-close-and-personal experiences with the pets. Kristin can’t wait to pet the Siberian Tiger, while Jackie slowly freaks out.

“I’m chill!” Jackie says, as she’s obviously uncomfortable. She admits that she’s deathly afraid of animals. “I’ve never been this scared in my life,” Jackie says, noting that she has had guns pointed in her face before. “This is how white people die all the time.”

Back in Hell’s Kitchen, Joe and Frank churn butter. Joe churns too hard, actually breaking the ceramic of the churner … twice. 

The Red Team is too busy to think about butter — instead, they’re meeting a bear, who happily waves at them. Kristin puts a marshmallow in her mouth in order to seduce the bear into a kiss, romantic music plays in the process. Kristin notes that every kiss she gives from here on out will probably have to involve a marshmallow, due to how magical it was. 

Dinner Prep

Both teams are back in the kitchen, and both are in the midst of prepping dinner for the Cowboy Steak Night. “Rachers aren’t even very picky people, right?” Kristin comments, saying that the menu is actually pretty simple.

Chef Ramsay joins both teams, and mentions that steak night is always a big night. In walks maitre d’ Marino, dressed in a suit with cowboy gear. Chef Ramsay can’t believe that he took it that far.

As far as the customers go, they’re sticking with flannels. Stacey Dash of Clueless fame is there for some reason, probably hoping to improve her image after that awkward moment during the Oscars.

Ariel and Chad are working on appetizers, and are quick to dish them out to the hungry diners. The Blue Team is a little less organized — Jared actually yells at Dannie for using the phrase “can I,” in regard to her scallops. In fact, he lectures her a bit like she’s a child.

The Stacey Dash Scallop Experience

Of course, Stacey Dash has negative things to say about her appetizer. According to her, her scallops are just a little too salty. Ariel takes credit for the mistake, but I’m going to believe that Stacey just voiced a complaint in order to get some extra air time.

“Usually I can’t stand working with women,” Frank says for the hundredth time. That said, he’s really enjoying his experience working alongside Dannie. Well, that’s just great.

Back in the Red Kitchen, Chef Ramsay is still unhappy with the scallops. “Refire! Stacey Dash! They’re overcooked!” he exclaims. During the refiring, the scallops get stuck to the pan, which makes Chef Ramsay extremely unhappy. I mean, they’re Stacey Dash’s scallops for gosh sake. 

Chef Ramsay calls the Red Team in for the mini-meeting, saying that it’s obvious the fish station needs help. Jackie lends a helping hand, and Stacey finally receives a dish she approves of.

All Eyes Are On Joe

In the Blue Kitchen, Chef Ramsay gets furious after seeing Joe toss the mash. “It’s just mashed potatoes,” Jared says with frustration. 

The Red Kitchen gets ready for their entrees. Jackie makes a claim that Ariel now thinks she has “fire hands” and can magically cook everything. (The scallop save was one of the few positive things Jackie has done since the start of the show, so I don’t completely agree with this claim.) Shortly after that comment though, Jackie burns the heck out of the tuna.

Frank is on meat and Dannie is on fish over in the Blue Kitchen. Once again, they’re waiting on Joe to complete his fries. “I’m doing my best Chef, I’m trying to bounce back!” he says to Chef Ramsay. Ramsay asks him to repeat the order he’s working on, and Joe fumbles a bit on counting his ribeye and arctic char. Chef Ramsay takes a look at his fries, and they look oily and inedible. “He needs a hand with his confidence,” Chef Ramsay snarks to Joe’s teammates.

The entrees are still stalled over on the Red Team. This time, they’re serving up raw meat. “It’s just white fat,” Chef Ramsay says while pulling the meat apart. That’s a mistake he doesn’t take lightly, and he proceeds to kick the entire Red Team out of the kitchen. Looks like Cowboy Steak Night wasn’t so easy after all, right Kristin?

In the Blue Kitchen, there are four chefs aiding with garnishes. Manda notes that they need to actually work together, in order to not get kicked out like their opponents. Eventually, they get it together and manage to push out all of their entrees.

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The Nominations

Upstairs, the Red Team is silent. Chad asks the team why they fell apart, and the group agrees that meat and fish slowed down the entire kitchen. Chad pulls out a notebook and jots down Ashley and Ariel’s names. Ashley quickly says that the two of them are definitely not the weakest overall. Soon, Jackie’s name gets tossed in the mix.

“Ashley’s a stronger cook than you,” Kristin says to Jackie. “Everything I cooked today was f*cking perfect,” Jackie fights back. She’s baffled that she’s even in the mix. In her words, she kills it in service every time. 

In the midst of her rage, Jackie admits that she’s only been cooking for three months. What? “I’ve worked way less than all of these people,” Jackie admits, yelling that unlike the fellow contestants, she’s actually solid on every station. Then she mentions how mad she is that she’s not able to choke them. (Someone, please notify the police.)

The Elimination

Chef Ramsay asks Jackie who the nominees are, and Jackie says it’s Ariel and herself. “I really don’t know. I believe it should have been Ashley,” she admits. 

“We chose Jackie, Chef, due to her lack of progress,” Kristin says. “We have to carry her most of the way, Chef,” Ashley adds. Chef Ramsay says that the whole thing is a mess, but calls Jackie and Ariel forward.

Chef Ramsay wants Ariel to be honest, and mentions how it was her worst performance thus far. “You struggled, big time,” Chef Ramsay says. Jackie says that she knows she can run BLT and shouldn’t have even been up for elimination tonight.

“The person leaving Hell’s Kitchen… is Joe.” Chef Ramsay asks Joe for his jacket, and says he’s not ready to be the next head chef. “Service after service after service, I’m not seeing any change.” Wow. Sorry, Blue Team. 

As Joe leaves, he mentions how the show is nothing like you see on TV. Chef Ramsay sends Ariel and Jackie back in line, and reminds them that now is the time for each chef to get their sh*t together. It’s a wake-up call for Ariel, who knows she needs to truly improve during the next dinner service. 

Hell’s Kitchen airs on Wednesdays at 9pm on FOX.

(Image courtesy of FOX)

Karen Belz

Contributing Writer, BuddyTV