Sometimes I think Ashley Iocco, the 26-year-old spray tanner on Big Brother 14, has to be an actress, because there’s no way a human being can be as monumentally stupid as she is. But this week during the Power of Veto competition, she reached new levels of idiocy.
The competition involved having to estimate how much of a certain candy was in a large display. I can understand how her answers are so wildly incorrect for almost every round, but it’s her explanations that defy logic and reason.
Her Picture Method, for instance, is one of the most confounding and perplexing things anyone has ever said, and I will be SHOCKED if it doesn’t earn a place on next week’s episode of The Soup. You can watch the video below (the Picture Method is explained starting at 2:34). Here’s what she said:
“My strategy for estimating candy was a Picture Method. The Picture Method is to picture everything in pictures and see how many pictures can fit within the picture.”
Again, I want to believe she’s some incredible genius operating on another level, like when Jordan Lloyd correctly guessed David Hasselhoff last season after seeing a bar of soap and a pair of opera glasses.
Later, Ashley tried to explain math to us:
“In my mind, I’m thinking how many little bushels of lollipops can fit into the first tier of the tree. You have to double it because it’s a 3-D object. So then you would do 12 times 12 and then you add them all together.”
Why would you double something because it’s 3-D? Again, maybe my mind is too simple to comprehend her genius, but since I was a math major in college, I don’t think so.
Enjoy this week’s Power of Veto competition for yourself and savor Ashley’s bright-eyed stupidity and the Sesame Street sound-alike the show used.
(Image and video courtesy of CBS)