Zoe attempts to explore her family tree by starting at the roots of Blue Bell’s Belles society, but not without some torture from a sour Lemon. Yes, I used as many puns as possible.

This episode is pretty much everything I expect from Hart of Dixie: silly, lax on the medical stuff, fun, melodramatic and Southern. A typical, solid episode and a good returning set of episodes to look forward to.

12 Labors of Hartules

Zoe’s walking and it’s a mouse! Is it a Mickey or a Minnie? Who was later suggested to be the spirit of Harley? Am I reading too much into this? The mouse leads Zoe to boxes of her family’s stuff. I thought the mouse would be in the box. Remember that the premise of this show is that Zoe Hart, doctor extraordinaire, moves to the South to inherit her father’s practice? Yeah, seems like the writers are remembering too.

“Wanna fit in? Find out where you fit.” I smell a theme forming. Zoe seeks out her aunt, a member of Lemon’s exclusive Blue Bells club. Zoe Hart has legacy, which everyone in America knows is a guarantee that she’ll be in. But that doesn’t mean they can’t have a little fun with it.

Cue the montage.

Like Zoe, in the most ridiculous red gown outfit. Or making Zoe say the best chant/rap ever when someone mentions “honey.” I guess that word comes out casually in the South.

The Pregnancy Pact Gypsy Curse

“I can’t have a baby cause I’ve been cursed by Lemon.” Oh no. Is this the medical subplot for the episode? Can’t this show just be about Zoe and her wacky friends? I don’t need an Everwood; a Stars Hollow-lite will do!

Three years ago, the Bells went to the gypsy grave to make a pact. No one should have babies until all shall be married. One of the minions, Annabeth, wants to conceive but can’t. And then another one can’t. Apparently, living with Lemon is like living in an authoritarian regime, which causes stress. Okay, this is too much crap. I’m calling it. Collective distress? Why would they stay friends with her?! Ugh.

Lemon, annoyed at the growing sympathy and Zoe supporters, does what she does best and induces psychological warfare. Translation: Zoe is shot with paint balls. Lemon really is evil; those things hurt and it makes me pine for Community even more. Sigh.

Anyway, the two have a heart-to-heart session where Lemon confesses that she doesn’t want to grow into the roots because she can’t imagine abandoning her children, which ties into her ridiculous pregnancy pact. Makes sense, but sloppy. And I guess she and Lemon and the rest of our loveable cast have experience in damaging parenting.

Regardless, Zoe is out of the Bells and Lemon lifts the curse. Or she’s just nicer.

Blue Bell’s Blue Balls

Do you know how long I’ve waited to use that pun? Since I heard this show was set in Blue Bell. But never in my wildest imagination did I think Lavon Hayes, former football star and current mayor, would be the victim. You feel me?

So Lavon is in a funk over Lemon, Didi, something. Boy no longer has any game, just mopes around like a little puppy. So Wade, fulfilling his duty as bro, sets on the task to get Lavon’s groove back. That includes Nascar girls, y’all.

Didi is so cute, y’all. I hope that these two crazy kids can make it. But Lemon is one force to be reckoned with, unfortunately. I see these two as doomed.

Papa Pissing Contest

Not only are my boys, Wade and George Tucker (always the full name), attractive, they’ve got daddy issues. Just what The CW promised!

George Tucker needs to prove to his father that he can go out on his own as a lawyer; he’s determined to protect small business owners from a Large Mart. Also, whoa. Didn’t think Hart of Dixie would ever get political on me. After convincing landowners, Jason Street, I mean George Tucker, has only one land left and only one option to do so.

“We’re gonna blow up a road? I love this job.” Ugh, I wish that was this show, Didi! Alas, no. But her enthusiasm is endearing. The owner of the land is Wades’ crazy old drunken father Earl.

So now we have George Tucker vs. Wade. Wade wants Earl to get the money so he doesn’t have to support his dead-beat dad. Tucker wants to prove himself to his dad. It’s a lot of Daddy issues vs. Daddy issues and I’ll allow it because it makes them even more lovely.

George Tucker, being a lawyer, deduces that Earl won’t want to accept the money because it will cut off ties with his son, Wade. True. So Wade, being lovable, convinces his dad not to sell the land so they have an excuse to see one another. Also, Earl buries a bunch of money in the ground so his property is even more valuable now. Boo-yah.

Emily E. Steck
Contributing Writer

(Image courtesy of The CW)

Emily E. Steck

Contributing Writer, BuddyTV