'Glee': 15 Most Evil Sue Sylvester Quotes
'Glee': 15 Most Evil Sue Sylvester Quotes
There are three essential ingredients to an episode of Glee: a relationship in trouble, one awesome song (or four, or five) and the delicious maliciousness of Sue Sylvester (Jane Lynch).

Tonight, the first season of Glee comes to a close, as do the incredible zingers of our favorite tracksuit-wearing tyrant. Whether downright evil or delightfully surreal (or both--our favorite), Sue's insults are fitting epitaphs as we say goodbye to the awesomeness of Glee until the fall. But don't be too sad: we're willing to bet that Sue will spend most of her summer vacation brainstorming and rehearsing all-new creative expressions of contempt for next year. Because that's how Sue ... C's it!

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"Let's break it down. You want to be creative. You want to be in the spotlight. Face it: you want to be me. So here's the deal. You do with your depressing little group of kids what I did with my wealthy, elderly mother: euthanize it. It's time."
-- to Will in "Showmance", sowing the seeds for the eternal Will-Sue showdown

"That was the most offensive thing I've seen in twenty years of teaching. And that includes an elementary school production of Hair."
-- in "Showmance", reacting to New Directions' envelope-pushing take on "Push It"

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"You know, the way you use your mental illness to help these kids is really inspiring. I'm shocked you're not married."
-- to Emma in "Acafellas"

"I'll often yell at homeless people: 'Hey, how is that homelessness working out for you? Give not being homeless a try, huh?' "
-- During Sue's Corner in "Preggers"

"I think you should both pack up and move out of the district, unless you wanna lose your man to a mentally-ill ginger pygmy with eyes like a bush baby."
-- to Terri in "Vitamin D", telling her about Will's interest in Emma

"I don't trust a man with curly hair. I can't help picturing small birds laying sulfurous eggs in there, and I find it disgusting."
--to Will in "Throwdown", starting a series of hair gags that just won't stop

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"I'll need to see the set list for sectionals, after all. I want them on my desk warm from the laminator at 5pm. If it is one minute late, I will go to the animal shelter and get you a kitty cat. I will let you fall in love with that kitty cat. And then on some dark cold night I will steal away into your home and punch you in the face."
-- to Will in "Mash-Up"

"Those are what I call lazy-makers. They discourage our able-bodied students from getting their proper exercise by using the stairs!"
-- to Will in "Wheels", against his proposal to build wheelchair ramps in school

"All I want is just one day a year when I'm not visually assaulted by uglies and fatties. Seriously, Ohio, these retinas need a day off. So here's the dream, the Friday after Christmas, which I have off, if you're hideous stay at home. Spend the entire day watching home videos of a time when you weren't too repulsive for me to ever want to look at."
-- during an edition of Sue's Corner in "Mattress"

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"I'm reasonably confident that you will be adding revenge to the long list of things you're no good at, right next to being married, running a high school glee club, and finding a hair style that doesn't make you look like a lesbian. Love you like a sistah!"
-- to Will in "Sectionals"

"You may be two of the stupidest teens I've ever encountered -- and that's saying something. I once taught a cheerleading seminar to Sarah Palin."
-- to Brittany and Santana in "Hell-O"

"I'm gonna donate this [hair] to the victims of Hurricane Katrina, so they can use it to plug the holes in their trailers."
-- To a kid whose hair she's just chopped off in "Hell-O"

"You don't deserve the power of Madonna. Simply put, you have all the sexuality of all those pandas down at the zoo who refuse to mate."
-- to Emma in "The Power of Madonna"

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"You know what, I checked out of our conversation about a minute back, so good luck with your troubles, and I'm gonna make it a habit not to stop and talk to students because this has been a colossal waste of my time."
-- to Kurt in "Laryngitis"

"And that young terrorist went on to become the first gay president of the United States, Abraham Lincoln."
-- to Principal Figgins in "Funk"

(Images courtesy of Fox)



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