Ten The Voice contestants will enter, but only nine will leave. An overwhelming 79% of you agree with my prediction that it will be Daniel Passino headed out the door. Are we all right or is there another upset in store on The Voice?
Remember, this a live blog, so stay on this page and refresh every 15 minutes or so to get the latest updates on who is safe, who is in trouble and which awkward questions Carson Daly asks the contestants as he dangles their chances of future career success in front of them.
The Voice Predictions: Who Will Make the Top 9? >>>
DNCE (aka Joe Jonas) Opens the Show and Results
I actively try to ignore all the Jonas brothers at all times. Until one of them, usually Nick, forces himself into my direct attention, I pretend they don’t exist. This is the most flagrant use of a Jonas brother I’ve ever seen, though. The fact that this “band” is pretending it is anything other than Joe Jonas‘ back-up musicians is hilarious.
The Mother’s Day tribute that follows is way more emotional and effective. Even if Carson ruins it by literally saluting his own mother at the end. I’m going to assume Carson’s mother is not actually a veteran and her son is just a weirdo.
Alisan Porter is the first artist to be offered safety! It’s so obvious that it barely deserves reporting, but it’s the only tidbit that Carson is giving us for now.
More Results, More Questions
Christina blatantly lies to us by saying Team Christina is trying to be humble. There’s nothing really wrong with it, but Christina has spent every free second that she isn’t picking low-cut outfits saying how amazing her team is this season. Last time I checked, that was the exact opposite of humble. After that and even more stupider Q&A’s with Carson, we get more results.
America saves Adam Wakefield and Shalyah Fearing. It’s a little bit of a surprise that Shalyah is in the clear this early, but I don’t have a problem with it. Shalyah has become a bit boring lately, but she can easily get back on top. A Bottom 2 spot would have been a nice way to shock Shalyah into action, but maybe she will see her iTunes rankings and decide to do something anyway.
Sawyer Fredericks Returns to The Voice
It seems like forever ago that Sawyer was actually on the show, but it really has been a year, which is two seasons ago. It feels like a lot of the heat has died off on Sawyer’s career, but this performance serves as a nice reminder of Sawyer’s talent. If we’re comparing Sawyer’s single to that of Jordan Smith’s song earlier this season — and I am — this single is much better.
America Saves Some More People
Hannah Huston and Mary Sarah are both moving on. So, effectively, every guy except Adam Wakefield is in trouble. This certainly keeps things interesting with Laith and Bryan’s safety being uncertain, but it better be Nick and Daniel in the Bottom 2…
The Voice Recap: The Top 10 Perform >>>
The Bottom 2 are Revealed
…And they are! Paxton Ingram, Laith Al-Saadi and Bryan Bautista are all saved by America’s votes. Nick and Daniel are the Bottom 2. I’m a terrible person, but I’m actually looking forward to how Christina deals with this development. Is it possible she will finally recognize that Team Christina is not God’s gift to music? Probably not, but this means she’ll have to stutter through a “save my artist” speech, which could hurt Nick more than help him.
Nick Hagelin Performs “Thinking Out Loud”
I want to round up every annoying lady in the crowd who’s screaming their heads off as Nick sings and either give them a harsh talking to or a sterilization. They not only need to chill, but they are actually over-powering Nick’s vocals. For once, I actually want to hear him. This performance starts off strong but really doesn’t finish strong. It’s good enough to save him, probably.
Oh, god, Christina’s speech is just rambling and weird as I hoped/feared. “We all need love and we all need fans.” Come on, Christina. Can you pretend for a second that you aren’t a human Tinker Bell and will literally die if someone isn’t applauding everything you do?
Daniel Passino Performs “Uptown Funk”
The one thing that you can say about Daniel is he’s fearless. He has no qualms about going out on stage and looking like the whitest man who has ever lived. The moment Daniel walks out of The Voice sound stage after this results show, he is going to burst straight into flames from the intensity of his whiteness.
As silly as Christina’s speech to America was to keep Nick, I’d much prefer to have that than what Daniel gets from Pharrell. Pharrell pretty much says that he is done with Daniel. Oh, I’m sorry, he’s content with what Daniel has achieved so far. I don’t think Daniel feels the same.
America does, though; I don’t think I’ve ever seen such a dominant lead in the Instant Save. There is usually, at most, a 10% margin separating the artists. It’s basically an 80/20 split in Nick’s favor according to the live results of the votes. Damn, Daniel, that’s not good for you…
So to the surprise of exactly no one with eyeballs who’s able to read percentages, Nick Hagelin is saved. Daniel Passino is out. I guess congrats to me and 79% of you; we were right.
The Voice airs Mondays and Tuesdays at 8pm on NBC.
(Image and videos courtesy of NBC)