Things are starting to get intense on The Bastard Executioner. Lady Love has to have an heir, Wilkin’s still trying to keep his secret identity hidden and some priests are hunting people down in order to find some sacred text, taking the tattoos off their backs while they’re at it. So what will happen in this episode, “Piss Profit / Proffidwyr Troeth”?

The episode starts with Lady Love and Isabel covering up the fact that Lady Love has her period. Isabel suggests that Lady Love have sex with some men so that she can actually get pregnant.

The Bastard Executioner Recap: Does Someone Reveal Wilkin’s Secret? >>>


Is Wilkin’s Wife Going Crazy?

Wilkin takes his new son to go meet Annora, while his new wife spies on him. Then Wilkin goes to talk to Annora privately. He thinks it’s risky that she’s selling at the market, but her oils have been helping his friends’ pain. His pain, though, isn’t getting any better. Annora mentions that the executioner’s wife has a “crippled heart” and that he has to watch her because she’s “close to madness. So clearly, things aren’t getting any better there.

Sir Gaveston’s Visit

Things go from bad to worse for Lady Love, when that gross guy from the previous episode of The Bastard Executioner, Sir Gaveston, shows up. She needs to look pregnant fast.

Sir Gaveston talks about how they need proof of the heir by doing a “piss profit,” and if she has a son, he’ll inherit everything. It turns out that Milus had no idea that Lady Love was “pregnant.”

Lady Love tells Sir Gaveston that she got pregnant just hours before her husband died. Sir Gaveston calls her out as a liar. He says that if she takes it back now, she won’t be punished, but she’s not backing down.

Wilkin’s New Mission

Wilkin’s friends are still locked up in that hole. He’s been sneaking them food and drinks with his other friend, Toran, and his son’s help. Unfortunately, Milus walks in and almost catches them.

He needs Wilkin and Toran to help him get a relic and destroy it. The relic is too powerful. Wilkin and his friend aren’t convinced, so Milus threatens their friends in the hole. If they do it, he’ll let their friends work their sentence off. In the end, Wilkin says yes, but he’s not happy about it.

Milus warns Wilkin that his friend is getting too unpredictable, while Wilkin tells Milus that he’s drunk on power.

So Wilkin and Toran head out. They violently attack the men who have the Bible, and set the carriage with the Bible in it on fire. “Dirty deed complete,” he says.

Not so fast. People are in that carriage! They desperately try to get in and pull the people out, but they don’t make it. It turns out one of them was Edwin Pryce’s wife.

Wilkin goes back and immediately punches Milus in the face. They just go at each other. “This is who we are, Wilkin Brattle,” Milus says. He exclaims that they did what needed to be done and they have to protect the shire.

Sir Gaveston’s Secret

Milus sends two women to spy on Sir Gaveston. They sleep with him and report back to Milus.

Milus then goes to eat with Sir Gaveston, who says he had heard that Lady Love was barren. Milus then asks why Sir Gaveston wants their shire so badly. “It makes one wonder if you are looking for a place to hide,” he says. But who’s after him? Sir Gaveston says that he’ll only answer if Milus sucks his dick, but he was just kidding, humiliating Milus.

Milus then beats up this kid who had started working for him and owed him a debt. He just loses it. I’m not quite sure how they’re connected, though.

It turns out that Milus’ spies are actually Sir Gaveston’s half-sisters and had sided with him the whole time.

Lady Love’s Solution

Lady Love goes to talk to Wilkin, who asks her to set the prisoners free. He then says he’s going to a healer, Annora, for help with his face after his fight with Milus. That gives her an idea. “Do you ever feel like you’re living the life of another?” Lady Love asks. Of course not. He has no clue what she’s talking about. He says he can bring her to Annora.

So Wilkin and Lady Love go to see Annora, but Lady Love thinks it’s “foolish” and that “this is not who I am.” Wilkin says this is simply the “other life” she was talking about.

Lady Love meets Annora, and Lady Love breaks down in tears. Annora assures her that God still loves her and then asks how she can help.

While Lady Love and Annora talk, Wilkin has another hallucination. He sees Petra coming out of the water. She asks him to follow her and says he belongs with her. He says yes, she takes her clothes off and she falls into a hole and screams. Lady Love and Annora wake him up, though, and Annora tells Wilkin to keep Lady Love safe.

Isabel went to Annora, who gave her urine from someone who actually was pregnant. Lady Love gives it to the examiner, who announces that Lady Love is, in fact, pregnant. Sir Gaveston has a temper tantrum and leaves.

Lady Love then goes to see Wilkin. She tells him that Annora’s remedy worked and gives him the decree that the prisoners can be released. He then accidentally calls her “My love,” which is super awkward, but they hug it out. Unfortunately, Toran, who accused him of getting too close to Lady Love, sees them and tells Wilkin’s new wife about it. And she’s going to lose it.

The Bastard Executioner airs Tuesday nights at 10pm on FX.

(Image courtesy of FX)

Robin Lempel

Contributing Writer, BuddyTV