Big Brother 16 is almost here with 16 new HGs and a bunch of new twists. But it’s never too early to make predictions. Who will win, who will go out right away, who will get involved in a showmance and what will be the big new alliances?

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Keep in mind that last year I was totally wrong. In my pre-season predictions for Big Brother 15 I thought Jeremy would win. Individually, I was sort of right about the girls, writing that Jessie would be a “useless floater,” GM would “rub people the wrong way” and Aaryn would “annoy me.” For the guys, however, I thought Jeremy would “fly under the radar” and Spencer was “a sweeter, gentler Lane.” I could not have been more wrong.

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Still, it’s fun to look at the Big Brother 16 newbies and try to predict what will happen. So here are my bold, fearless, probably wrong predictions for this year.

Who Will Win?

Historically, older people and minorities never win, so we can instantly eliminate Frankie, Derrick, Brittany, Jocasta, Devin and Donny. Zach seems too intense, Amber seems too clueless, Victoria seems too naïve, Hayden seems too dumb and Joey and Paola appear a little too threatening to men.

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Just like that, I’ve narrowed the potential winners down to four. Christine and Nicole are both young and very knowledgeable about the game, which helps a lot (the last two winners, Ian and Andy, were super fans). Both are like a combo of Jordan Lloyd and Ian Terry. Meanwhile, Caleb and Cody seem sweet and non-threatening, which could make them Hayden Moss-style winners.

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After two seasons of male winners, I’m leaning towards a female to take the title this year. My early money is going to be on Christine. I like her a lot from her video, she’s a student of the game and she knows sign language, which is probably going to help somehow with memory competitions.

Who Will Be in a Showmance?

The showmance pickings seem kind of slim this season, but that shouldn’t stop love from blossoming between the good-looking young people. Southerners Amber and Caleb seem like the most obvious fit.

But I’m going to predict that the true, romantic showmance of season 16 will come from 21-year-old Michigan nursing student Nicole and 23-year-old Jersey salesman (and underwear model) Cody. I could very easily see them as the new Daniele and Dominic, a couple with a sweet guy and a wildly smart girl. Of course, if Nicole is too smart for that, Israeli photographer Victoria could also be a good match for Cody in a more Jeremy/Kaitlin kind of way.

Who Will Be Evicted First?

I’ve already pegged surfer dude Hayden as an obvious first target. Dumb California guys tend to go quickly in recent years (see season 11’s Braden and season 15’s David). But I could also see a bland pretty girl going first (season 14’s Kara or season 12’s Annie). In that instance, Brittany, Victoria or Amber could very easily be on the chopping block.

What Girl Alliance Will Form?

Based on the interviews, I can see two alliances forming quickly. Most of the ladies want an all-girl alliance, something that always fails. Still I see them trying. Paola and Joey appear to be the most gung-ho about it, but I suspect their relative inexperience and lack of knowledge of Big Brother will be a hindrance to recruiting girls like Nicole, Christine and Jocasta. That leaves Brittany, Victoria and Amber, who will be deadweight for any alliance (like Jessie last year, no one will want them except for numbers). Odds are, if Paola and Joey do form a team, they’ll also add Frankie, whose pink hair would be an ideal match for Joey’s blue.

However, that alliance will fail quickly, probably because they form an isolated, cocky clique similar to GinaMarie, Aaryn and Kaitlin from last year that alienates the others. The best possible outcome for that trio is to enlist tattooed barista Christine for an “Off-Beat” clique or, more accurately, a Lady Brigade with Christine as the Matt Hoffman. Heck, Paola’s nickname, “Pow-Pow,” already makes her sound like the new Enzo “Meow-Meow” Palumbo.

What Guy Alliance Will Form?

As for the other side, dude alliances always happen. And this year, I’m sure Zach, like Nick Uhas, will try to start some Moving Company-style quintet with Cody, Caleb, Devin and Derrick. It matches up quite well (Devin and Derrick are Howard and Spencer). It would also be eerily similar to last season with the three guys left out of the alliance. Frankie, Donny and Hayden are basically the same as Andy, Judd and David from season 15.

Like the Moving Company, however, it will fall apart quickly thanks to Zach’s overzealousness and the fact that the ladies will target him almost immediately as the big schemer of season 16.

Who Will Win Fan Favorite?

Frankie. This isn’t even up for debate. Like Elissa last season with the Brenchel Army, Frankie enters the house with a pre-existing fanbase, not just from his YouTube channel, but from his sister, Ariana Grande, and her 16 million Twitter followers. It’s not fair, but he’s bound to win any and all advantages in which the public gets to vote on something.

What do you think will happen on Big Brother 16? Will Christine win and Hayden be the first to get evicted? Who will Cody hook up with? And do you agree with my theoretical alliances of a Lady Brigade and the Moving Company 2.0?

Big Brother 16
premieres with a two-night Move-In event on Wednesday, June 25 at 8pm and Thursday, June 26 at 9pm on CBS.

(Image courtesy of CBS)

John Kubicek

Senior Writer, BuddyTV

John watches nearly every show on TV, but he specializes in sci-fi/fantasy like The Vampire DiariesSupernatural and True Blood. However, he can also be found writing about everything from Survivor and Glee to One Tree Hill and Smallville.