The best quotes from the 14th episode of season 2 of Glee.

#22 “Pop music now glorifies binge drinking. Just listen to any hit by pop sensation Ke-Dollar Sign-Ha.”

-Principal Figgins mispronouncing Ke$ha’s name

#21 “I am aware of how much fun alcohol is”

Brittany: “But it’s Alcohol Awareness Week.”
Santana: “Precisely And I am aware of how much fun alcohol is.”

#20 “Noah, it’s Santittany and Artcedes.”

-Santana coining nicknames for Santana/Brittany and Artie/Mercedes

#19 “The Rachel Berry House Party Trainwreck Extravaganza is officially a go.”


#18 “Kurt’s been blackmailing me ever since he saw my browser history.”

-Finn on why he brought Kurt and Blaine to the party

#17 “I owns that guppy mouth. Those shoddy Aerosmith lips belong to me.”

-Santana about Sam during Spin the Bottle

#16 “I told my mom I had the flu and she made me a traditional tea made out of panda hair.”

-Mike Chang on his hangover

#15 “It’ll help your hangover, that’s what Bloody Marys are for. Hair of the dog that done bit yo’ ass.”


#14 “Bisexual is a term that gay guys in high school use when they want to hold hands with girls and feel like a normal person for a change.”

-Kurt to Blaine

#13 “Blaine is the first of a long line of conflicted men that you will date that will later turn out to be only the most flaming of homosexuals.”

-Kurt to Rachel

#12 “It’s kind of like nursing a P.O.W. back to health so he’s at his strongest when you torture him to death.”

-Sue on why she helps Will

#11 “I don’t know what two guys do when they’re together. You know, I sat through that whole Brokeback Mountain. From what I gather, something went down in the tent.”

-Kurt’s dad

#10 “Unfortunately Kitty Dukakis could not be here because of disinterest.”

-Principal Figgins at the Alcohol Awareness assembly

#9 “You guys, I’m really nervous. Ke$ha’s been a cultural icon for weeks and I really want to do her music justice.”


#8 “And now performing their hit single “Tik and Also Tok” by rapper Ke-Dollar Sign-Ha, the New Directions.”

-Principal Figgins introducing the glee club

#7 “My nose is still filled with the acrid stench of teen vomit. And there is simply but one person to blame: the alcoholic teen vomit fetishist Will Schuester.”

-Sue’s announcement

#6 “How ‘bout you crack a Four Loko, Count Boozy Von Drunkaton.”

-Santana to Will

#5 “That is so racist”

Quinn: “There’s a fair amount of the pot calling the kettle black right now.”
Brittany: “That is so racist.”

#4 “If you don’t drink, what will you have to live for?”

-Santana to Will

#3 “That’s my cell phone number”

Will: “Look in the top corner of your form. That’s my cell phone number.”
Sam: “Yes!”

#2 “I’m gonna get a new boyfriend out of this who can keep up with me vocally and in the future give me vaguely Eurasian-looking children.”

-Rachel on her plan to date Blaine

#1 “I just had a relationship with a guy who turned out to be gay. That is songwriting gold!”

-Rachel on her failed relationship with Blaine

John Kubicek

Senior Writer, BuddyTV

John watches nearly every show on TV, but he specializes in sci-fi/fantasy like The Vampire DiariesSupernatural and True Blood. However, he can also be found writing about everything from Survivor and Glee to One Tree Hill and Smallville.