started off with a bang, and a ton of new viewers last week, and thankfully, the second episode of the season continues with the unique blend of gore, drama, sex and comedy. So wipe the blood from your recently dyed hair, because I want to do real bad things with you.
Things get off to a disgusting start as True Blood
picks up right where it left off, with Eric throwing AIDS Burger Man's severed arm onto Lafayette before dripping the fresh blood from his mouth. True Blood
is the only show that can make you vomit and laugh at the same time, because all Eric is concerned about is whether there's blood in his hair, since it will ruin Pam's dye job.
Eric takes Lafayette upstairs where Pam is upset that she'll need to go
much shorter with Eric's hair. Lafayette, better than ever, is willing
to do and say absolutely anything to escape alive. He's even willing
to give up Jason as the likely person who took Eddie. Unfortunately,
since Sookie is so important, this information is no good.
However, Eric is more interested in any news his fellow V dealers have
about a missing vampire named Godric. Lafayette thinks a guy with the
e-mail address email@example.com might know, but he doesn't know
who this person is, sending him back to the dungeon. Trust me when I
say you haven't truly lived until you've heard Eric ask "Who is this
In a scene even more disgusting than the first, Lafayette hatches a
plan to escape based on the knowledge that AIDS Burger Man had a metal
hip. He finds a chunk of the dead man's body and digs around the
gooey, slimy insides to pull out the fake hip. Unfortunately it's
covered in a plastic coating, so Lafayette uses his teeth to chew open
the casing to procure the metal hip. He uses that piece of metal to
break the chain and free himself. Personally, I would've rather died
or crawled through 500 yards of awful smelling foulness.
He makes his way to the bar where a human woman is there with a gun as
the daytime security guard. She threatens to shoot Lafayette, which
she does, only it causes her to freak the hell out. He's put on a
couch to rest until nighttime when Eric returns. Lafayette looks for a
final way out by asking for them to turn him into a vampire. He swears
he'll be strong and loyal and do whatever they want. Lafayette makes a
good pitch, but Eric and his vampire friends decide to think it over
while enjoying a snack, so they take a bite out of Lafayette.(1) (2) (3) (4) NEXT>>
(Image courtesy of HBO)