HOT VAMPIRE SEX!  Bill and Sookie take each other's clothes off, and for the first time on True Blood, Anna Paquin's breasts are in full view.  I believe this means the only taboo left to break is full frontal male nudity, which will probably come some time this season.

It gets pretty pornographic with the thrusting and moaning, but then it goes from sexy to downright disturbing when Bill bites Sookie's neck and then kisses her, letting her blood drip into her mouth and down her cheeks.  Congratulations, True Blood, for having a graphic sex scene more disturbing than when Sookie did it with a freshly dug up Bill, or when Jason had anonymous sex covered in trash.

Finally, if you wanted to know what Lafayette has been up to for the past two weeks, he's tied up in some freaky medieval dungeon.  He and several others are chained together, forced to poop into a bucket.  They get another cell mate, and it's none other than the Bon Temps redneck Lafayette served an AIDS Burger last season.

AIDS Burger Man tries talking to Lafayette, but the former drug dealing cook is simply reflecting on all the bad things he's done.  AIDS Burger Man confesses all his sins because he's scared, including having his head crushed by his cousin's girlfriend's breasts, an infidelity that caused his cousin to throw him out a window, giving AIDS Burger Man a shattered hip replaced with metal.  He also apologizes for his homophobia by explaining that when he was 15, he let another boy at camp give him oral sex.

Finally as AIDS Burger Man plans an escape, their captor comes down to pay them a visit, and it's...Eric the Vampire!  His menacing walk is a bit lessened by the fact that he was in the middle of a dye job and has tin foil in his hair.  Eric wants a one-on-one chat with AIDS Burger Man about a fire that killed three vampires, but the big escape plan includes pushing a silver cross on Eric's cheek.

That plan fails, obviously, and Eric grabs the idiot and goes to town, eating him up and essentially ripping his body apart.  Some of the blood spills onto Lafayette who looks on in horror, though I imagine he's also a bit turned on by Eric's raw strength and black wifebeater.


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-John Kubicek, BuddyTV Senior Writer