Dorinda’s boyfriend, John, verbally attacked Bethenny in the last episode of The Real Housewives of New York City, but he wouldn’t come out for her own birthday party at her home in the Hamptons, would he? Let’s cut the small talk and find out.

Happy B-Day, B

Bethenny loves her house in the Hamptons and she’s excited to open it up for everyone. She wants it to be a chill day full of BBQ and tailgating drinks in the cozy fall weather away from the city.

Dorinda is already nervous about bringing John to the party. She explained to him the night before that he needs to apologize to Bethenny for coming to the bra party, attacking her business and shouting at her. John doesn’t seem to get that this is a real problem for Dorinda. He says that he’ll apologize, but he’s not very enthusiastic about it.

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Carole is the first to arrive to Bethenny’s where B tells her all about her conversation with Ramona and Dorinda the night before. She says that Dorinda was on the defense, a position she probably plays quite often when it comes to John. She’s starting to feel bad and lose respect for Dorinda because of her troll boyfriend, but at this point she knows she’s said her piece about him and now it’s time to back out of her business. She is still expecting an apology though.

Speaking of apologies, is Carole expecting one from LuAnn? She says her plan regarding LuAnn is to simply keep her distance. She doesn’t know what will happen if she tries to approach her and it’s making her anxious.

Ramona arrives later and while she’s there for the afternoon, she’s bailing that evening. It’s Saturday night and she has the date in the city after all!

The Avoidance Dance

Dorinda starts in on John right away to apologize. But he doesn’t do it right away and then it becomes awkward. He’s sulking around Bethenny’s party; making her uncomfortable. Instead of approaching it head on, he, in the words of Bethenny,  “lurks around like Dracula” without saying anything.

As if things weren’t awkward enough, The Countess comes strutting in with her hula hoop. She greets everyone, and says hello to Carole, but Carole’s holding fast to her “ignore LuAnn” stance.

So, now there are two separate groups at the party. There’s Carole and Bethenny and other randos avoiding LuAnn and John (and by default Dorinda) in the other group.

LuAnn claims that she wants to clear the air with Carole, but she think that Carole isn’t ready to do that. Bethenny wants to try to help them get a few minutes to talk, but every time Carole sees LuAnn, she heads in the other direction. That, and she’s got her own B.S. to deal with.

John finally sits down next to Bethenny and tries to talk. But she gets up and ends the conversation. Now at least he can say he tried and Bethenny was the one being difficult. Dorinda says in her confessional that Bethenny should not have invited people to her home that she was not prepared to be nice to. But Bethenny says she couldn’t have invited Dorinda without John because she’s too fragile at the moment. Carole wishes that Bethenny would just deal with John for Dorinda’s sake.

Finally, LuAnn traps Carole into a conversation around the campfire while everyone’s making s’mores. Carole doesn’t think the conversation needs to be private because they’re not friends and they have nothing to say to each other.

LuAnn insists that they’ve said a lot of hurtful things to one another over the course of the year but Carole maintains that Lu’s the one who did all of the hurtful things. LuAnn just keeps saying she wants to move forward and Carole says she would want to move forward because she’s the one who was in the wrong. Right now, Carole is happy and she doesn’t need LuAnn or any of her negative comments, in her life.

Carole notes that LuAnn was missing one important thing from their conversation: An apology. She says if she doesn’t feel sorry for what she did, then she’s a monster and she wants nothing to do with her. The two eventually agree to be friendly but not friends. A classic Housewives’ compromise.

Bethenny finally agrees to have some words with John privately. But things do not go well. Although he apologizes, they get into another heated argument about her business and about Dorinda. He calls Bethenny an opportunist and she says it’s true, but she doesn’t use people like he does.

She fills the girls in on what happened and Dorinda is exasperated once again. She knows John was in the wrong, but she hates feeling stuck in the middle between her man and her friend. She’s at her emotional breaking point.

Now Bethenny feels bad about hurting Dorinda. It’s a hard situation and she really doesn’t know what to do. So, she decides to really clear things up with John for Dorinda’s sake. She tells him that the two of them are straight and they can get along for Dorinda. Of course, John, being the smug ass that he is, considers this as a win. Even though no one is a winner here, John is the worst.

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An Ugly Brunch Display

Jules is excited to have the women over for brunch. Even though her house is still under construction, she’s proud to show it off.

But Carole and Bethenny are not excited to be there. They’re planning on leaving early even before they walk in and once they do, Bethenny does nothing but criticize the home construction project, even telling Jules and Michael that it’s just a money pit. There’s never been anything subtle about Bethenny, but it’s still pretty harsh.

Not only that, but Bethenny and Carole make comments under their breath about Jules’s eating habits during breakfast. They say that she’s not eating anything and they feel bad for her. Wow, Bethenny taking her rudeness to the next level.

And then it gets even worse! Carole wants to leave as soon as the Countess arrives. So Carole and Bethenny escape to the car, running and giggling without saying a proper goodbye.

Both Dorinda and Jules are turned off by their behavior. Jules tells Dorinda that she felt judged in her own home and that makes her want to put a wall up and not be friends with them. What a mess.

Next episode: Jules opens up to Bethenny about her past issues with an eating disorder. (So Bethenny’s intuition was correct, but that doesn’t make it any less brash.)

The Real Housewives of New York City airs on Wednesdays at 9pm on Bravo.

(Image courtesy of Bravo)

Gina Pusateri

Contributing Writer, BuddyTV