Last week's episode was so awesome. It's the kind of classic Real Housewives episode I really enjoy, where it's just all about parties and people being ridiculous, and less about the fabricated drama. This week's episode is equally silly, as it's all about Housewives and Simon bullying each other on the internet. "Mean Tweeting," is what they're calling it.
Simon is ready to make good with Jill and the other wives. Simon is a character I just don't understand on this show, but I do like how often he dresses like a lesbian. I'm with Kelly, it is awkward and weird, but I think that's mostly on Simon. And for the record, I don't think the weirdest thing about the situation is Simon asking Jill out to lunch to talk about things. I just don't understand Simon and Alex as humans.
Upon their departure, Simon said he would Tweet Kelly, which she took as a threat to continue the Mean Tweeting. Ew, everyone get off Twitter now. Is this all about Simon's new single, "I Am Real"? Is that what this is about?
Sonja's Feng Shui expert is visiting, along with the plumber. When you're struggling financially, the energy expert is the last thing to go. I wonder if Sonja only knows about calling the plumber from porn stereotypes.
Anyway, she didn't need his help because she found a blackberry stuck in the toilet and got it out herself. She didn't even realize it was missing? Why was there a blackberry in the toilet and how could she not know? So many questions going through my head, and the plumber's, I imagine.
The Feng Shui expert is more accustomed to rich people and their problems. She tells Sonja that she's a fighter, and she's been strong. Then she told Sonja to face her bed to prosperity and make a dedication to new beginnings.
Jill is working on the energy in her own home, or rather, having other people work on it for her. She had a painting party so she could sit down and talk to Kelly while LuAnn painted her walls. The topic is cyber-bullying. Jill wonders, "who does that?" and I wonder, "who in their 40's cares about that?" LuAnn thinks Simon is cyber-bullying as a method of social climbing. The whole thing is silly, strange, and gross.
Alex seems to think that someone wants her to choose between Jill and Simon, but she also doesn't seem super aware of what's going on with the Housewives and the internet.
Ramona is throwing a party for herself and Sonja just because. Ramona bosses everyone into place with roses. It's like a weird, winter-themed funeral for someone who's alive. Because it's not technically a surprise party, everyone just stands there awkwardly and Sonja isn't sure what is going on or why everyone is staring at her, holding roses. What and why is this party?!
Ramona is still stinging about not getting invited to the Skweez focus group. Then Ramona and Sonja watched a slideshow of themselves when they were younger. Talk about "squeeze," amiright?
Proving that there's truth in the old adage, "you can't take a baby to a nice restaurant because they will grab everything and make noise and you'll have to call your nanny to remove the baby," Cindy takes one of the twins to a restaurant with her parents.
You also can't take a Housewife to a nice restaurant, because they will get into fights. If you take Kelly she'll call your husband "weird" and "creepy," and if you take Alex she'll stare at you with confused squinty eyes. Kelly asks Alex to ask Simon to stop Mean Tweeting, and Alex looked confused. That's all you can do with Kelly, though--she can have the whole conversation on her own. (Image courtesy of Bravo)