Jason and Bethenny's Hoppy Honeymoon
Jason and Bethenny's Hoppy Honeymoon
Okay, you guys, I've read your comments and I think you're right that I've been a little harsh on Bethenny. Admirably, she's doing a lot and manages to have it all without going insane like some of the other Real Housewives. So before someone makes a "Leave Bethenny Alone!" YouTube video, I'm going to lay off her and try to see the show in a different light. The woman's about to have a baby after all! (in reality tv time, in the real world she has actually had the baby already, and according to her blog for People Magazine, it saved her life).

After doing some more research, and spending some time on Bethenny.com, I realized that this woman is a freaking empire. She's anything but a "housewife," in layman's terms. You were right, she is to be admired for her drive and I mis-judged her. I mean, geez, how can I hate on a natural food chef with a cute little baby? Can't do it. Plus this was a good episode and I found it even more touching than last week's wedding episode.

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So in tonight's episode they're honeymooning in St. Barts. Where did that giant stuffed animal come from?! (oh, it's memorabilia). Despite the pregnancy hitting her pretty hard post-wedding, Bethenny is game to enjoy the honeymoon and relaxation as best as possible. Jason and Bethenny seem to be having fun, plus their honeymoon suite/villa looked Ah-MAZING. 

While skinny-dipping in the pool, Bethenny notices a giant iguana a few feet away. Apparently those things are everywhere, and that is gross and scary. Speaking of gross and scary, I like Bethenny's theory that "the ankles are the windows to the ass."

The iguana (presumably) got into their honeymoon suite and eliminated a sort of foamy turd. And so they have to clean it up, and search for the iguana before they can sleep easily. Honeymoon: ruined. But not so ruined that a couples DIY pregnancy wax can't bring them back together (you're a good man, Jason).

Over breakfast, Bethenny and Jason discuss the last name issue (a solution provided by Demi Moore via The Marriage Ref: keep your maiden name professionally but for your personal/family life, be Mrs. Hoppy). Then it's anyone's guess as to when walking/talking/potty training etc. start for children. I guess when you're so busy writing a book you don't have as much time to read one.

In the episode's sweetest moment, Bethenny gets emotional seeing two little girls playing on the beach (meanwhile, Jason awkwardly attempts windsurfing). Bethenny got sad because she's nervous and everything is about to change. I think I would be sad, too, they barely have any time to just enjoy being married before the baby comes.  But spoiler alert: their baby turned out so cute!

At the final stop on Jason and Bethenny's food crawl, they try a hot pepper and now we know why Bethenny went into labor five weeks early (either the pepper or that Four Seasons foot massage). Bethenny tells Jason that she finally feels pregnant for the first time. I think it hit them both. Now that the wedding is out of the way, I guess. 

On their final day, Jason and Bethenny put on wigs and danced around. Someone please tell me, is that a thing in St. Barts? Back in New York, it's time to start thinking baby. And preparing for the baby. And figuring out what size babies are at what age. But hey, free stuffed elephant for your troubles!

All signs point to Bethenny having a girl (which is good because it's what she wants). I would love to be able to walk into a high-end baby store (or any store) and say, "I'll take this, this, and that." So I guess it's time to get started on my multiple books, cocktail line, and DVDs. :(. 

I admire Bethenny for having the ovaries to do a nude pregnancy shoot. They did a sexy-ish one on Dad Camp and it seemed like a really special thing to do. I don't know about the sprawled-on-the-bed position, but I like the idea of the whole thing (the upright ones looked better, I think).

Next week (in reality tv land) she's having the baby! Check back tomorrow for a list of ways Bethenny may have induced early labor.

Also, I recommend following Bethenny on Twitter (@Bethenny). Her tweets during the show are pretty entertaining.

(image courtesy of Bravo)

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