Best Quotes from 'The Real Housewives of New Jersey'
Best Quotes from 'The Real Housewives of New Jersey'
This week on The Real Housewives of New Jersey, some words were thrown around. Some made more sense than others, and a lot of them had to be bleeped out.  Here are some of my favorite, and most poignant, words thrown around by the True Poets of New Jersey.

Teresa: "I used to be able to spend what I wanted, when I wanted. Now [Joe]'s like, 'don't spend a lot of money!'" But we don't listen to Joe. The pizzeria is raking in the dough! GET IT? DOUGH?!

Teresa: "I just wish that it could go back to the way it was and Dina being around again."  Me too, Teresa. Me too.

Danielle: "I believe the really only safe way to have sex is abstinence."  My brain just exploded. Let's put that on a poster and hang it in the school nurse's office along with "my favorite sport is reading!"

Danielle: "Temptations are not something I'm worried about with Christine. She's got a great life."  Sorry, Danielle, but Christine is a model. Guys are going to want to do her. Until they find out who her mom is, of course.  

Kim G.: "I hear you guys! I know somebody's here!"  Kim, stop creeping. She's got eyes everywhere, and her camera-sense is tingling.

Kim G.: "I feel bad for me, that I'm like, in this situation in the middle."  I feel bad for you, too, Kim, but only because your desperation is showing.

Joe: "I'm like King Kong. I might just start going crazy."  Oooh, foreshadowing and self-awareness all in one!

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Danielle: "I just want to smell her. I want to smell my mom." Kim: "Ooh boy." For once I relate to Kim G. 

Caroline: "Audriana is just like a little porcelain doll."  Or a little vinyl doll with a "lifelike baby" finish.

Danielle: "Kim G. She's not ... who I think she was."  And just as my brain had re-formed from the last explosion ...

Danny: "So, you make up your mind and you let me know how we'll handle it."  Ah Danny, such an enabler. And totally willing to murder someone.

Kim G.: "Hi, I was passing by, I mean like I have to talk to you. I am like desperate. I hate her f***ing guts."  What?  Change your jogging route, Kim.

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Kim G.: "I cannot believe that I am here and I am discussing this woman again." Really? You can't believe it?  How long have you lived in this neighborhood?

Kim G.: "She's acting like an ass. An ass acts like that." "She can go scratch my ass." Kim spends a lot of time on the farm.

And that whole fight between Kim and Danielle was just nuts.

What were your favorite moments?

(images courtesy of Bravo)