Things have been pretty sad for the New Jersey Housewives lately, so I thought a good old everybody-gets-a-trophy awards ceremony might cheer them up. So, based on last night's episode, here are the awards!
Most Improved: Jacqueline. She has successfully navigated the stormy waters of the Real Housewives drama and has come out looking very sane and mostly impartial. She still has room for improvement, though, because no one should dress a baby like this:
Most Fur Worn at One Time: Teresa
. This was truly a difficult category, and there were a lot of contenders, but in the end, Teresa took it with her fur-on-fur-on-fur combo that she wore at Posche. The woman loves fur.
Most Likely to Succeed: Albie
. Sure, because that's a story line. Law school.
Most Vindictive: Danielle. Karma is a bitch when it's convenient for her. Danielle has never heard of leaving the past in the past, and certainly not when she could be perceived as the victim. So she's pressing charges against Ashley, and salivating over the fact that something actually happened this time. And how about those self-defense classes?
Most Defensive: Ashley. She's also the most in denial, and the most obnoxious. But I'm sure she just thinks it's cute to laugh and act like it's no big deal when her parents are trying to have a serious conversation with her.
Greatest Desire to be on Television: Kim "G". Seriously, that woman was everywhere in this episode! Those other two women from the "busted up Sex and the City" don't stand a chance when Kim has planned a "jogging" route that goes by all the Housewives' houses. I would also like to point out her stupid hat she wore for that scene in Posche.
(images courtesy of Bravo)