'The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills' Recap: Kyle's Peace Offering
'The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills' Recap: Kyle's Peace Offering
Gina Pusateri
Gina Pusateri
Contributing Writer, BuddyTV
So Brandi Glanville made the shrewd decision in last week's episode of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills to "go up against" Lisa Vanderpump. And whatever that may actually entail, it doesn't sound like the best decision Brandi's made, considering Lisa has shoes with a higher IQ than Brandi.

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It's Witchcraft

Carlton goes to a Wiccan store that sells beads and candles and statues and other spiritual things, I guess. She talks about how she keeps a crystal in her bra to bounce off negativity. That's one way to deal with Kyle, I guess. Yolanda meets her there to look at some candles, which apparently also tell the future after they're done burning. 

Carlton and Yolanda debrief about Carlton's drama with Kyle. Yolanda says that Kyle said something stupid coming from a place of ignorance, but it was still uncalled for.

Kyle and Joyce meet for tea, and Kyle tells her all about tattoo-gate and the drama with Carlton. Kyle thinks that Carlton put a spell on her family's computer because the desktop switched from her family's photo to words like "bigot," "wraith," and "larva." It's obviously the work of the devil.

Kyle resolves to just stay away from Carlton, and the two of them decide not to include her on their girls trip to Puerto Rico, even though all of the other girls are going. Even Brandi. Who called Joyce a "big fat pig" earlier this season. I have a feeling Carlton's bra crystal is not going to be too happy about that.

Kim and Brandi meet to get spray tans in preparation for their trip to Puerto Rico. Kim has plans to help her oldest daughter, Brooke, move into her new apartment with her boyfriend. Brandi is already anxious thinking about the day that her kids are going to leave.

Brandi is nervous to know if Lisa and Ken are going on the PR trip. She confesses to Kim that although she isn't easily intimidated, she's a bit scared of Lisa because of her mastermindedness. Kim doesn't understand why Brandi and Kyle are afraid to stick up to Lisa.

Goodbye Gigi

Yolanda goes to Mohamed's to help prepare for Gigi's graduation/going away party. Mohamed is preparing some homemade Arabic food for the party with spices he picks from his own garden. I've said it before, and I'll say it again, I have literally never seen a house as crazy huge and decadent as Mohamed's. Like, my Sims houses weren't even this freaking fancy.

Brandi already seems a mess getting into the limo to go to the party. She also still has her busted lisp from her allergic reaction. Brandi now thinks that Lisa knew all about Scheana having an affair with her husband before she met Brandi, and that her acting surprised and sending Scheana home at a party a few years ago was all a ruse. I don't get it, how would that even serve Lisa?

Carlton says that out of courtesy and respect for Yolanda and her family, she's not going to engage with Kyle. Brandi, on the other hand, has a hard time not speaking her mind with Lisa, so she resolves to avoid her at all costs.

Everyone plays some awkward ass musical chairs around the dinner table so Carlton doesn't have to sit next to Kyle. Thankfully, David Foster manages to break the tension by name-dropping Stevie Wonder.

Then Gigi makes a nice speech where she does get a bit teary-eyed thanking her supportive parents, and how she appreciates how they've both worked for everything they have. Yolanda gives a sweet toast to Gigi too, telling her how much they love her and are going to miss her. Gigi seems like such a well-adjusted young adult, considering how much wealth she comes from. Good luck, Gigi!

Something Out of Nothing

After speeches, like any good graduation party, the belly dancers come out with the swords. Lisa playfully takes hold of a sword and jokes about how there are too many heads to choose from.

Lisa notices Brandi is being uncharacteristically quiet. Brandi tries to deflect her questions, but she's coming across as standoffish.

Yolanda pulls Brandi aside to ask her why Carlton wasn't involved in the girls' vacation plans. Brandi tells Yolanda she wasn't invited because of the drama that happened at Ken and Mauricio's party, and for once, she actually agrees with Kyle.

Then some weirdness happens when Kyle asks Brandi to give Carlton the matching ring to the necklace Kyle gave Carlton at the pool party. She wanted it to be a peace offering, but Lisa points out that the ring doesn't even match the necklace, which angers Brandi because she thinks she's sticking her nose where it doesn't belong.

When Brandi and Lisa try to give Carlton the ring, she can't accept it, saying that it isn't a peace offering if Kyle didn't offer it herself. So Brandi takes the ring back to Kyle, who seems shocked that her stupid middle school plan didn't fly with the grown-ups. Brandi also tries to blame Lisa for convincing Carlton not to take it, but the opposite is true; Lisa tried to tell Carlton that it was a peace offering and the two of them needed to resolve their issues.

Kyle confronts Lisa about her comments, and Lisa doesn't even realize what she said, that she was simply making an innocuous comment. She can't understand why everyone is trying to make something out of nothing.

Later, after Kyle forgives Lisa for "playing both sides of the fence," she asks her if she wants to do some shopping for Puerto Rico. And oh, by the way, the reason Joyce didn't come to the party is because her dad died, but Kyle still needs a bikini for her trip. At least Yolanda and Brandi wonder if they should cancel the trip entirely.

The next day, Lisa visits Kyle's shop to pick out some long dresses for the trip, which Joyce does not want to cancel. Kyle still feels some tension with Lisa, and when she tries to bring it up with Lisa, she thinks that it's ancient history. She could have sworn that everything was okay with them, she doesn't even know what she's talking about. Kyle just wants to hear an apology (for what is a mystery), but Lisa just tells her that she's never had, or never will have, a friend more loyal than she is. Know that, Kyle. 

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills airs Mondays at 8pm on Bravo.

(Image courtesy of Bravo)