Ken wants Cedric to move out but Lisa, who is SO cute gardening, doesn't mind him (even though all he does is sit by the pool in his man-kini drinking wine and use their cars without refilling the gas tank.) I don't mind him either! How can they argue about anything when Giggy is wearing a cute little complementary outfit with a strawberry on it?!
Camille invites Adrienne and Paul to play doubles with her and not-Kelsey. Then Camille invites Kyle and Mauricio, who she has kind of been awful to. To her credit, I can tell that Camille is really trying. She's just dim. In a move that can't make anything better, Kyle tells Kim about Camille's invite and Kim was like, "Oil and water!" and then she set the table for one as they discussed the white party. Because of course they have an annual white party in Beverly Hills.
An Indecent Proposal
Pandora, Lisa's daughter, is having a birthday party that would have been perfect if not for her boyfriend. He stands up to make a speech about how much he loves Pandora and concludes it with, "I would love to spend the rest of my life with you." As he leans down to kiss her everyone gasps in anticipation of a ring, but instead Jason just kisses Pandora and sits down. Woh wohhhhh. Apparently he does it just to wind up Lisa and Ken. How ... charming?
Kyle, master of appropriate dinner conversation, asks Cedric about his troubled past. He was born in Paris to his prostitute mother. He lived on the streets at 7, and as he sighs at this, Kyle tells him, "you don't have to say." Then why are you asking, Kyle? The story continues until about 15 years ago when Ken and Lisa scooped him up and we understand why he is their permanent house guest. In an interview voice-over, it seems that Kyle doubts the validity of Cedric's story. Hmmm.The Saga of Snowball Continues
Tensions are rising between Taylor and Russell, and the fact that they're keeping the puppy he got for their allergic daughter isn't really helping. They're drifting apart a bit because of business.Guess Who's Coming to Tennis?
Camille greets Kyle and her family with loads of compliments. She is trying so hard. Adrienne and Paul arrive, followed by some more of Camille's adoring friends. Among her friends is, as always, Hot Nick wearing a wig, this time accompanied by his WIFE, Tricia. Camille kisses Nick on the lips and I guess it's just not a big deal. On with the tennis, especially since Mauricio has probably forgotten the insignificant details of Camille and Kyle's feud.
Things are finally going well, except for the ever-unfortunate Paul who has a broken nose AGAIN because one of their sons head-butted ("butt-headed") him in the face. Thank god for Adrienne. And yet, New York comes up AGAIN. In Taylor's words, ENOUGH! ENOUGH! In Kim's words, oil and water.
After tennis it's pool time, naturally. Of course Camille needed to get that bikini on. Kyle and Adrienne don't want to wear their bathing suits, which Camille chalks up to "female jealousy." She's such a great friend to have. Like a sport, Kyle jumps in with her clothes on. Paul pushes Adrienne in--classic Paul! It seems like everyone is at least tolerating each other.See You at the White Party
At Kyle and Mauricio's fabulous white party, Taylor is looking forward to having fun with Russell. Because he seems SO fun. Oh and Martin, Kim's Bond-villain-like date from before. Kim is upset that Martin didn't call her, even though she didn't call him to thank him after giving her a ride home an hour and a half out of his way. He shows up and it's awkward.
Enter Camille: eager to talk about Kelsey and flaunt her wealth. Things aren't going well with Kelsey, though. Trouble. More trouble: Camille has a gift for Kyle that she hopes Kyle will "get a kick out of." The book is How to Behave and Why
. OH HILARIOUS JOKE. God, these women are vultures! They just pick away at each other until one of them explodes! I think she mentioned something about reading it together, which was sort of almost cute I guess. Hey, half of an old, chewed-up olive branch!
Taylor may actually be jealous of Kyle, or at least her marriage. Russell sucks. He's having a horrible time at the party, and tells her so. Taylor longingly watches Kyle and Mauricio kiss, and some SUPER dramatic music plays before Mr. No-Fun says, "let's go." Russell leaves, Taylor stays. I like Taylor and I feel bad for her.
Taylor tells Kyle a tale of woe as Kyle dresses Portia in her pajamas. Taylor didn't really marry her forever match, did she? Oh well, Russell can be a party pooper and Taylor can have fun with the other Housewives. Taylor leaves the party, and we see a really sad shot of her standing alone with a big piece of cake, waiting for her limo for one.
Next week, the scratch hits the fan with Camille and Kelsey's marriage!(image courtesy of Bravo)