'The Real Housewives of Atlanta' Recap: The Bones Don't Lie
Sunday, February 19, 2012
Last week's Real Housewives of Atlanta was heartwarming, so the women are feeling really good about themselves and their contributions to the orphanage. Everyone except Marlo, whose shrimp is wrong. But regardless, they toast to giving and being friends for the first time since their plane landed.
On their tour of a historical museum, the women learn that men could just ask for women and the woman would have to be "fetched." They weren't so sure about that. Next they meet a sangoma, which is an herbalist. I'm not sure about him, with his bathing herbs that you swallow and then barf up again that only men can touch, but hey he throws bones! Every trip must have a psychic and he must be this one's.
Phaedra is not into it, because they are "human bones." But everyone else says yes. Before Phaedra can leave, he reveals his bones, that turn out to be shells. So that's OK. He tells Kandi that she's going to get married to the guy she lives with. When she tells him her fiance died, he changes his answer to "he is still with you, he is like your man." Then he tells Marlo she needs to get married, and Sheree that she won't. The bones say no!
NeNe's bones reveal that she is not happy. "The man is the right man. He's a good man," the herbalist tells her. Ooh Gregg. He tells Cynthia that she is going to marry, and that she's happy, then reaffirms that NeNe is not happy. And good day to you!
The women stop by Marlo's room and note that it's like a store. I mean, it is, she set everything up on display with lighting and everything. Insane. Marlo brought 29+ pairs of shoes, but no one else's shoes were counted. Then they had a sleepover and talked about, what else, sex.
Cynthia ruined everyone's good time by pointing out that they were having a good time. It shortly turned into an argument about who talks too much about labels. Kandi accused Marlo of flaunting her labels too much, and NeNe said it was OK, which Kandi accused NeNe of knocking Kim for. Then Marlo started yelling about how much she LOVES fashion.
The next morning, Marlo got sick. She wants to see an American doctor, though. Marlo agrees to stay home, and NeNe offers to stay with her. Is Cynthia jealous yet? Phaedra thinks the herbalist may have poisoned her somehow. Maybe she needs to bathe in that crazy stuff (then imbibe the bathwater and throw it up).
Cynthia goes on safari with The Smalls and impresses them. Talking about money and attitudes, they miss all the animals, They say they can't imagine Kim on the trip, spending time with kids at an orphanage. Then they arrive at their Bachelor-style brunch in the bush.
Moments into their quiche, NeNe shows up in her own Jeep to check up on Cynthia. Kandi tries to goad NeNe into talking about Marlo, but she likes Marlo. Cynthia flips onto the side of The Talls, which is in direct opposition to what she said earlier. NeNe admits that she is the captain of the Tall Ship, then offers that Kim is the boss of The Smalls. I don't know that I see that.
The Smalls decide not-so-candidly to call Kim. Kim is upset to hear about Marlo because she got chewed out for bringing Sweetie to Miami last year. Then the Smalls admit that they said they couldn't imagine Kim in South Africa. Awkward! Bad move, Sheree. Poor Kim. She would totally have loved it.
For the last night in Africa, the women don some traditional African garb and face paint. They sit down for dinner and Kandi stirs the pot yet again. She tells Cynthia that she felt like Sheree threw her under the bus. Sheree responds, and Cynthia does not. Geez Kandi, playing both sides only lands you in trouble.
NeNe asks if they were reporting to their boss, and Kandi insists that SHE is the boss of her own life. NeNe says everyone is their own boss. "Do you guys make your own decisions?" she asks them. They nod. "That's what I thought," the boss says.
Kandi throws in toward Marlo again, and everyone is grumpy and tired of arguing. But they must continue to argue out of habit.
(images courtesy of Bravo)