'Finder' Premiere Recap: How a 'Bones' Spinoff Begins
'Finder' Premiere Recap: How a 'Bones' Spinoff Begins
Laurel Brown
Laurel Brown
Senior Writer, BuddyTV
Are you looking for a Finder premiere recap? Well, you've found it! (Sorry. Bad joke. Forgive me?)

Almost a year after it we first caught a glimpse of The Finder on Bones, we finally get our first look at the actual spinoff. Did you miss the episode? Want to relive it? You're in luck! Keep reading for our recap of the Finder premiere, "An Orphan Walks into a Bar."

Star Power
We first see Walter Sherman wearing an all-access pass (jealous!) backstage at a concert. He is immediately accosted by a shaggy, bearded man who asks if Walter found a missing guitar. Walter confirms this and says the rock star -- thus far unnamed -- can come by the bar the next day to get it.

Why can't Mr. Rock Star have the guitar now? Probably because Walter doesn't have it yet.

The lost guitar is actually in the hands of a heavyset fellow in a very loud shirt. Loud Shirt Guy races through the halls of some swanky hotel, pursued by mysterious footsteps. Suddenly Loud Shirt Guy remembers he has a gun and sets down the guitar to aim at his pursuer.

Unfortunately, for Loud Shirt Guy, his pursuer turns out to be a bizarre, rolling robot-thing with shoes attached. Walter, meanwhile, has planned for this diversion and grabs the guitar.

Walter leads a shouting and shooting Loud Shirt Guy into a ballroom, where Leo and the lovely US Marshal Isabel Zambada are waiting. Since Loud Shirt Guy is a wanted fugitive, he gets arrested.

Back at his Ends of the Earth Bar, Walter hands the retrieved guitar over to... John Fogerty! You youngsters might not know, but this is a member of the band, Creedence Clearwater Revival. Now you know.

John Fogerty fills up some valuable minutes rocking out, utters some cryptic and probably-deep words about rock/guitars/life and leaves.

Oh Right, the Main Plot
But the guitar has nothing to do with the main plot. That plot involves a kid, Cooper Allison, who shows up at the Ends of the Earth Bar desperate to find his missing father. It seems that Daddy was a war hero -- once saved by Walter Sherman, of course -- who crashed a plane in the Florida swamps and hasn't been seen since.

Walter is on the case! He drives an incredibly purple convertible to an airfield, where a backwoods idiot confirms that Allison did indeed take off from there. After playing awhile on the runway, Walter lets it slip that he's already found Colonel Allison's plane.

He hasn't. But it's a fake-out that will prove important.

Dinner and Track Suits
As soon as Walter finds a bank robber attending a cock fight (in order to help the lovely Marshal Isabel), the action moves straight back to the bar. Over dinner and flirting, Isabel informs Walter that the backwoods airfield was the target of a multi-agency task force that was disbanded two days after Allison went missing.

Meanwhile, Cooper -- the client -- and Willa -- a teenage, gypsy delinquent who lives at the bar -- are flirting and fixing his car outside. But then a couple of burly men in orange track suits (!!!) show up, yelling about drugs. After beating on the kids a little, the track-suited men are stopped by Walter and Isabel (wearing only underwear -- ooooooooh!) and hauled off into custody.

Was the heroic Colonel Allison involved with drugs?
Following up on Isabel's task-force lead, Walter and Leo travel by motorcycle (with a sidecar!) to interview a military police lieutenant named Royce. Royce indicates that Allison was indeed crooked and points to someone named Amadea as the head of the operation.

Walter now believes that Allison was a drug mule and enlists Isabel to find out more connections. Since the two track-suit guys have conveniently been killed, Walter & Company go straight to the source. Amadea turns out to be a trumpet-playing Absolutely Fabulous wannabe and unrepentant drug smuggler. She confirms that Colonel Allison was flying drugs to the Dominican Republic. Then she tosses everyone off her boat. Literally.

It Was All a Dream...
That night, Walter has a vivid dream of flying with Colonel Allison while microwave ovens slam into the cockpit windows. As a zeppelin explodes, we learn that Allison loved his son more than anything. Then Walter wakes up.

Thanks to his amusing recreations with balloons and dolls, Walter figures out that Colonel Allison was actually on a mission of mercy, delivering oxycodone to desperate patients in Haiti. The microwaves in the dream have something to do with how Allison managed to avoid radar. But I didn't follow that. Sorry.

The result of all of this is a trip out to the swamp. Walter flies his ultra-light (what vehicle doesn't this guy have?) and soon finds the downed plane. Colonel Allison is indeed inside -- and disgusting, just for you Bones fans. Cooper, who has been doubting his father's love and pride, is heartened by a photo of father and child found in the wreckage.

Walter, meanwhile, finds the missing oxycodone and... something with the name "Royce" on it.

While Cooper consoles his grief by reading a note that Colonel Allison wrote before dying, Walter lays out the whole mystery plot. It seems that Lieutenant Royce was annoyed that Allison wouldn't share the drug business. So Royce contaminated Allison's fuel (which caused the crash) in retaliation. After Royce flips on drug-lady Amadea, the whole ring goes down.

Wind Chimes Save the Day
During all of this crime-solving, Willa has been planning to rob Walter and Leo before running away to her gypsy uncle, Shadrach. She does steal some cash, but then has a change of heart when she finds the wind chimes given to her by Leo. Making the excuse that she hasn't yet penetrated Walter's paranoia-vault, Willa hangs the wind chimes and decides to stay.

But Walter is suspicious... As he always is.

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What did you think of The Finder premiere? Did you figure out the mystery? Was John Fogerty a plus for you? Will you keep watching? Sound off in the comments section!

(Image courtesy of FOX)