Remember last week? It was hella depressing, and I don't use that word lightly. It came down to seven of the eight women being below the yellow line (and Rick saved the one guy, Patrick). Then Tina pleaded her case a little bit better than Allie and Allie was sent home. After the elimination, Tina is feeling guilty and might be wanting to go home.
Tina calls a group meeting to order to tell her fellow contestants that she is asking to go home today. TINA. WHAT ARE YOU DOING? Not cool. Brendan said it best, "It's just garbage, man."
Supposedly, Tina wants to go home to go on vacation. And then Lisa pipes up and says she will go home to take care of Allie. Uhhhh. Does anyone else want to go home? Bob comes into the room and tells it like it is: "This is bullsh*t!" You're not ready to go home, Tina. We're OVER it! Now let's hit the gym for a major circuit workout. I don't know what that is, and I have no desire to know it physically.
Bob is working everyone out hard (every workout is Last Chance Workout, every week is Shark Week). Where is Jillian? In her absence, Bob is SUPER mean. After the
Mean Bob workout, Bob reflects with Tina on her support system at home (and harps on that whole "pay it forward" theme that still seems a little forced). Tina's daughter, who has tried out for the show with Tina before, is the first person Tina vows to "pay it forward" to.
Jillian's back, and she's ready to help the ladies represent. Jillian refuses to have a "jock fest" this season, and I appreciate it. But let's meet Alison at the tennis courts, to mention paying it forward and tennis.
Anna Kournikova, Y'all!
She's sexy, she's fit, and she is here to make you feel overweight. She's also here to lead a tennis-themed workout. Wheee!
Also, commence the vaguely pornographic shots of Anna Kournikova. Brendan, the new creep on the block, tells us about how he hugged Anna Kournikova and didn't let go because she smells good. OHHH, BRENDAN.
Pop Challenge! The contestants have to put their tennis-themed skills to the test and put tennis balls in other players' cylinders. Now we'll see how people really feel about each other! Tina is obviously the first out -- you gotta earn it, Tina. What's that on your back, Tina? Oh it's a GIANT TARGET. Soon after, this turns into a battle of the sexes, and all hope for a balanced season is lost. It comes down to Brendan, Frado and Patrick. Frado wins immunity, and the prize for the loudest guy in town. Don't worry, Brendan, Anna Kournikova is still scared of you.
Bad news, guys, there's another surprise weigh-in the day after the pop challenge. This season is determined to prove that it's the craziest yet. The night before, Brendan, Frado and Patrick form an alliance of overweight douchebags. I don't really know much about Frado or Brendan yet, but I know I'm not a Patrick fan.
Just like last week, half the group will be below the yellow line and face an elimination challenge. Can you dig it? Frado, who has immunity, lost a tragic THREE pounds this week. This should be very interesting, especially since we know that Frado is playing the game. I hate game-players on The Biggest Loser, but every season has them, so we might as well find out who's going to eat all the cookies in the temptation challenge early.
The weigh-in continues to uphold the Week 2 Curse. Burgandy lost 1 pound, Tina lost 4 (causing her to cry but everyone is over it). Sophia lost 6 pounds, so did Ada, Lisa lost 5, Aaron lost 7. Adam reversed the curse a little by losing 12 pounds (you go, guy!). He's not a game-player, just a champ. Elizabeth lost 3 pounds, Rick lost 8 (not looking good for the girls again), Mark, who I like, lost 11 pounds. Jessica lost 7 pounds, Jesse lost 10, Patrick lost 12, and fellow d-bag Brendan lost 5. Not great, Brendan. Yet again, most of the women (excluding Jessica and Ada) are below the yellow line. Ughhh.
So, Adam gets to choose one person to save. I just hope it's not Brendan. Burgandy has a one-on-one complaining session with Adam (or at Adam, I guess). Will it work?
First, Tina needs to recognize the right foods to eat, like these new Yoplait Fruit Smoothies! They are so easy, and they helped Tina pay it forward! But even a Fruit Smoothie product placement can't save Tina from the wrath of a scorned group of contestants.
Before the elimination challenge, Jillian wants the boys to have to work out with a girl trainer, and she is the closest thing they have available. That was mean; we know that Jillian is all woman, and she'll beat the crap out of you to prove it. Inspired to finally put himself first and ask for what he wants, Aaron talks to Adam about possibly giving him the save.
It's time for the Elimination Challenge, and there's a bunch of sand and a big dump truck. Neat! Adam chooses Aaron for the save (I'll let this potential sexism slide for now). I would have liked to see him compete in the challenge and win, but I can't be bothered with that because I'm too mad at Brendan for being dumb and talking gameplay. So, there are four brass rings buried in four piles of sand. They have to dig until someone finds each brass ring. Absolutely ludicrous. To make the challenge even more difficult, the dump trucks dump 175 tons of sand on top of the sandboxes. Awesome! But still ludicrous.
This challenge will absolutely not come down to who wants it the most, it's mostly luck and digging ability. Elizabeth finds the first ring, and Brendan uncovers the second ring but Sophia grabbed it like a hoss. Brendan finds the third ring, and we are left watching three women digging desperately through a sand pile for a ring. Is this Bridal Bootcamp? Burgandy finds the final ring so it will be down to Lisa and Tina. Cue the dramatic music because these are the two ladies who didn't even want to be here at the beginning of the week!
Covered in sand and tears, Lisa and Tina backpedal as quickly as possible. Adam says he was "borderline disgusted with Tina." She is so out. And I liked her so much two weeks ago. Who will be forced to ponder the meaning of "pay it forward" on their own at home?
The vote reveals that indeed, Tina will be going home.
In the "Where Are They Now" segment, Tina looks great! She has chosen to "pay it forward" to her daughter, who is now joining Tina in her workouts. Tina's daughter has lost 85 pounds, and Tina wants to bring her up on stage at the finale to prove that she understood all that "pay it forward" nonsense.
Next week TWO people will fall below the dreaded red line and be sent home immediately! I love the red line because it is such a harsh mistress.
What did you think of this episode? Are you glad Tina went home? What was up with that brass ring challenge?
(image courtesy of NBC)