After a long, messy and scandalous road, Bachelor in Paradise
season 4 is coming to an end. The season that started with a production shutdown and a sex scandal comes to a close like all the other seasons: with a proposal. While the engagement doesn't "save" the season or make up for the uneven quality, it at least leaves thing off with a happy ending that the audience can feel good about experiencing.
It just takes a long time to get there.
The Last Day in Paradise ... Kind Of
While Chris Harrison told the cast they were done in the previous episode, that's not strictly true.The fat is just being cut. Anyone who doesn't think they have a future is leaving right away, but the solid couples are allowed one more date. There's no real surprises here, but it might be the most entertaining part of the season for how quickly the wins (and losses) keep coming. The developments are as follows:
- Jack Stone tries to make a relationship with Christen happen, but she peaces out and walks into the ocean, getting battered by waves. It is the greatest.
- Dean dumps D-Lo and flips back to Kristina, which isn't even aggravating at this point; it's just sad.
- Tickles and Jasmine decide they're just friends. I wasn't aware that it was ever beyond that point.
- Diggy chooses Jami over Dominique, and Jami chooses literally anybody but Diggy.
- Amanda "cries" and breaks up with Robby and his hair swoop because she cares about him (and his hair swoop) as much as her kids, so not at all.
This just leaves Raven and Adam, Taylor and Derek, and Lacey and Daniel. These are the final three couples of Paradise, and they're honestly the ones that show deserves for this messy season. Raven and Adam could be great, but they developed entirely in the background. The same goes for Lacey and Daniel. They're two pasty weirdos, but they could be each other's pasty weirdo if we'd seen them for more than five seconds. As for Taylor and Derek ... well, their most exciting moment was when he told her, "F*** you." That's really says it all, in a way.
A Trio of Jerks, a Corinne and a Sex Scandal
Thankfully, Bachelor in Paradise understands that all the couples are duds. They blow through the fantasy suite dates in record time, and we go to season 4's favorite way to pad out time: a long Chris Harrison interview special. Like all previous Harrison specials, this involves trotting out the bloated corpse of the Corinne and DeMario scandal -- and it's just as useless as the other times.
Even though Corinne and DeMario are together for this interview, a fact that only Chris Harrison finds noteworthy, nothing new is added. Well, nothing new but Corinne taking time out to pimp her clothing line. Evidently, sex (scandals) does sell.
The reunion then moves to the real meat, and that's not more about Scallop Fingers, but the grilling of Dean. Dean joins Chris in the hot seat, and he tries to justify his actions. It starts fine but spirals quickly out of control. Dean keeps harping on his indecisiveness and in love with Kristina lines until D-Lo exposes it all. D-Lo claims that Dean called her and they were "talking" after Paradise. This legitimately might be the shocking moment in this dull love triangle, but Dean, Chris Harrison and even D-Lo brush it under the rug.
Still, Chris Harrison thanks Dean for his answers, which he didn't give, and we move on to the next horrible man in this finale, Robby. Robby and Amanda are brought out, and it's revealed that they did date after Paradise but not for long. Because Amanda is "so nice" (not once in three seasons have I see Amanda be nice, merely boring), she gave Robby too many chances, but she eventually broke it off.
The twins, in their latest bid for relevance, call Robby out for cheating on Amanda in Colorado. Robby defends himself by saying he was in Colorado on business and he would never do such a thing. Whether that thing is cheating on Amanda or being a "social media influencer" who must travel to another state for business is unclear. In any case, they're not together.
Bachelor in Paradise isn't done. Lacey and Daniel are brought out next and they've also imploded, but it happened very quickly. In fact, right after the fantasy suites, everything fell apart as Daniel admitted in private that he lied about wanting to be with Lacey on camera. Lacey comes out swinging at the reunion, exposing Daniel for all he's worth, and it's rather glorious. This is the Lacey that should've been on Paradise, not the whiny crybaby mess that showed up. This girl has a spine and she's ready to make Daniel look like a lying, stuttering man-baby fool, which she does in spades. I'm in love with Lacey and I don't know how to feel.
Chris Harrison Finally Gets Some Wins
The finale is turning out to be as much of a disaster as this entire season has been, but there is some good news -- or great news, depending on your perspective. For starters, Raven and Adam are still together, and while they're not exactly more interesting, they do seem happy and cute. They're just a normal couple and that's not the worst thing, even if doesn't make for great TV.
Speaking of which, Taylor and Derek come out last. As expected, the two are still happy and in love and, as expected, it's completely boring. To her credit, Taylor does come off a lot better in the reunion than she ever has on the show. She's genuinely funny and self-aware, calling herself mean and crazy. If Taylor had cracked one or two jokes during her time in Bachelor Nation, maybe she wouldn't be so dull, but it didn't happen. At least Taylor has found Derek, who's her equally dull and equally attractive match.
To make it official, Derek gets down on one knee to propose to Taylor, who says yes. Honestly, it's pretty sweet. It's head and shoulders above the last proposal on The Bachelorette.
Taylor and Derek being together is nice but only in an abstract way. This might be the one Bachelor couple that doesn't get married on TV, and that feels right for a number reasons. At the very least, something good did come out of Bachelor in Paradise season 4. Even if Taylor and Derek's love won't set anyone's world on fire, it seems to be real.
Although, the real happy ending of the episode (and season) is a closing montage with Ben Z. and his dog -- the love story we can all get behind.
What did you make of the finale? Were you happy with the proposal? Do you think Derek and Taylor will get married? Will that wedding be on TV? Do you care if it is? Which guy came off the worst: Dean, Robby or Daniel? Let us know your thoughts in the comments section below.
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