'The Amazing Race 16' Recap: Racers Don't Look At Explosions, They Just Crawl Away
'The Amazing Race 16' Recap: Racers Don't Look At Explosions, They Just Crawl Away
First, the good news: Jordan and Jeff weren't eliminated in last week's The Amazing Race, despite being last.

The bad news: there is no bad news. So much for the metaphor.

"We believe we're in France": So said frontrunners Louie and Michael, when they arrived at their next destination. You see, their pit stop also turned out to be a bus, and they only figured they were going southwest of Hamburg and are headed to the country of romantics and chanson music.

They are in France, indeed. They're headed to the town of St. Menehould, where they have to pick up a baguette and their next clue. That clue happens to be inside the baguette, and that leads to some confusion between the teams and the hapless baker. Still, having something to munch on when you drive to La Main de Massiges, where they're headed next. And no, it's not a massage place.

"I feel like I'm to model for some army clothes": The Detour's set in the middle of a World War I reenactment, complete with low-flying planes and explosions. Choose In the Trenches, and you should translate a message sent out in Morse code. Choose Under Fire, and you crawl in some obstacle course to get to a French soldier with the message. Both Detours ends with the same guy, a person who will deliver the message via pigeons. Oh, and they'll be in full military get-up.

Nobody really takes the Morse code task, since apparently none of the teams know it. Then again, nobody has to know Morse code: there's a field manual. But that task's loss is our gain, as we get treated to a very cool viewing experience. Explosions! Gunfire! Planes! All the teams are either amazed at the set-up (Cord: "It was pretty real for a detour") or annoyed at what they have to do (Brandy: "Smart people do Morse code. Dumb people do this.")

Still, it doesn't stop the teams from playing the part, especially a particularly amusing Dan and Jordan, who ran the gamut from English accents to pretending that they're running away from the enemy.

What's up with the fake moustaches? They're then headed to a bicycle stop, where teams have to bike the four-mile course to the Pit Stop. Paying homage to the 1903 Tour de France, teams have to wear vintage biking outfits (err, odd hats and fake moustaches) and ride a century-old bike.

Continuing their streak from last week, Louie and Michael finished first, and won a 55" HD television. It was, all in all, a pretty good leg for them. "Our police schedules so in sync with this race," they first said. And then the Detour, with the explosions, fit nicely with their day jobs. No wonder they were called the team to beat.

Brent and Caite, on the other hand, encountered a last-minute snag. Blame it on the compasses again: they inadvertently skipped a route marker and proceeded to the bikes early. Phil didn't check them in first, but despite the last-minute wrangling they still finished in sixth. Turns out they failed to walk in the right direction after the Detour, completely missing the clue box with the blind U-turn.

The confident team gets humbled: It was the detectives who used the blind U-turn on this leg, and it's the already unlucky Joe and Heidi who got slapped with it. Earlier in the bus they got annoyed at Joe's statements that they'll still finish early despite a really bum knee. Blame it on the Argentine llamas and the Hamburg bungee jump. "He needs to be kicked off the pedestal," they said later. "He needs to be humbled."

And humbled they were indeed. After doing the obstacle course they were forced to do the Morse code task, and that proved to be much of a struggle for them. "Vive le liberty" was their first guess--already wrong because it's spelled as "liberte". They couldn't follow the message's breakneck speed, and as every team passed them by, they gave up on the fifth try and just hugged it all out. Phil had to eliminate them in the quiet war zone. Their message: "We will prevail. Viva le France."

Still in lucky seventh: As for Jordan and Jeff? They barely eked out of their last-place finish last week. They got lost heading to St. Menehould. They pretty much argued their way through the baguettes, while not figuring out the clue's inside the bread. They may have easily done the Speed Bump--reinforcing a trench with twigs, also in the war reenactment--they still bickered at the obstacle course. Jordan couldn't, in Jeff's words, "put [her] boobs on the ground and drag them".

But they still survived the Detour, and as Joe and Heidi decided they got humbled and hugged it all out--I know, this is annoying, for it happened last season too--the Big Brother team finished in seventh place. They may be starting last in the next leg, but at least they survived the Speed Bump. Now, to end the war...

(Image courtesy of CBS)