Last week, just over one million people watched the surprisingly amusing premiere of Pussycat Dolls Present: Girlicious.  With ratings like that it's a wonder the show is even back for a second episode, but because it is I'm here to cover every scintillating moment.  During the premiere we met 15 girls willing to sing and dance their hearts out for a coveted spot in Girlicious.  By the end of the episode, three girls had gone home and the remaining 12 were getting ready to move into a loft together, presumably because close quarters are more likely to lead to catfights.  Will anything in tonight's hour top last week's boot borrowing fiasco?  Read on and find out.

Tonight's episode begins with the girls moving into the Pussycat Doll loft, which comes equipped with a dance studio, exercise equipment, a music room, and the usual living quarters.  Chrystina and Natalie immediately seclude themselves, move into their own room, and start gossiping about the other girls.  We've never seen that happen on a reality show before, so it's quite unexpected.

The Pussycat Dolls pop up on a TV screen in the living room to point the girls toward their next challenge. They're going to need confidence for this one, which almost all the girls have an overabundance of.  The girls go see Robin Antin, and she tells them that they'll be separated into three groups of four and trained to perform superstar pop hits.

Cassandra, Alexis, Megan, and Jamie have to perform "Baby One More Time" by Britney Spears.  Cassandra can barely sing a note, but vocal coach Kenn Hicks is nice and calls her vocals "serviceable."  Megan suffers from pageant queen moves, which means she can't dance in that hip-hop way that the other girls can.  She needs a little less Miss America, a little more skank.

Carrie can't dance either, which is going to make her rendition of N Sync's "Tearin' Up My Heart" difficult to pull off.  Her teammates are Jenna, Charlye, and Chrystina, and the entire group goes insane when career-free JC Chasez shows up to give them some advice.  He tells them that they have to be willing to sound bad in order to sound good, which I don't think will be a problem.

As for the other group, consisting of Tiffanie, Nichole, Ilisa, and Natalie, they have to pull off Madonna's "Holiday."  Tiffanie's vocal histrionics aren't helping matters any.

After rehearsal, Robin shows up at the Girlicious loft and takes the girls on a trip to a baseball field.  She thinks that they can build some confidence if they sing the National Anthem in front of an entire baseball crowd.  That should be good for a laugh.  The girls split up and rehearse, and are told that the group with the best rendition will be chosen to sing that evening.  The girl who shows the most confidence in the group will win immunity.

The big drama in the episode revolves around Natalie, who whines throughout the challenge that she doesn't think her group has a chance at winning.  Later, when they fail to win, her group turns on her and blames her for not giving it her all.  Natalie defends herself for a while, but eventually runs out of the room in tears, ready to call home for some generic platitudes.

After practicing the National Anthem for a bit, the groups perform their renditions for Robin.  None of them sound particularly good to my ears, but Robin thinks that Chrystina, Carrie, Charlye, and Jenna are the best. They go out on the field in front of a crowd that consists of about 150 people and manage not to butcher the song.  Robin thinks that Carrie showed the most confidence in the group, so she won't be going home tonight.

After the immunity challenge is taken care of, it's time for the girls to go back to the Pussycat Dolls Lounge for their pop song performances.  The "Holiday" group starts things off and does a passable job at translating the Madonna song.  Lil' Kim thinks that Natalie needs to work on her vocals, while Nichole and Tiffanie did the best job of the bunch.  Ilisa didn't have enough of that Madonna sex appeal.

Megan, Cassandra, Alexis, and Jamie do a pretty terrible performance of "Baby One More Time."  This is how the 2008 version of Britney Spears would probably sound singing this song -- all flat and dead inside.  All the judges point out the terrible pitch problems, with Cassandra being the worst of the bunch.  Robin and Ron think Megan is too boring, while Alexis "didn't blend."  I'm not sure what that means, but next to Cassandra she looks like a regular Maria Callas.

"Tearin' Up My Heart" is next, and I can just picture young Justin Timberlake dancing in his wifebeater like it's 1998 all over again.  Vocally this group is definitely the best of the bunch, and the judges agree.  They had a sense of authority, style, and could actually sing.  Maybe that visit from JC did them some good after all.

The judges confer over the girls' performances.  The "Baby One More Time" fiasco was obviously the worst of the bunch, and they decide to blame Megan for it.  She's going home to participate in more pageants, but first she has to turn in her pink feather boa.  Next week, Nicole Scherzinger shows up to perform as one more girl says goodbye to Girlicious.


- Don Williams, BuddyTV Staff Columnist
(Image courtesy of the CW)