Season 6 of Lost premieres this Tuesday at 9pm on ABC, and since it's the final season, there's a good chance that you're going to or throwing a Lost premiere party.  You and some friends will gather to watch the two-hour season premiere and bond over the insane shocks sure to come your way.

But Lost is no joke, and watching Lost is as close to a religious experience as a TV fan can have, so you need some ground rules.  The last thing you want is someone ruining the experience, so follow these 23 simple rules and there will be no need to call in Sayid to torture one of your unruly guests.

1. All Lost Party Attendees Must Sign a Waiver
Enforcing the rules is important, so before the party starts, draw up a legally-binding contract with these rules and force all attendees to sign it, agreeing to comply with all of the rules.  If anyone breaks any of the rules, you have the right to act like Sayid and torture the ever-loving crap out of them.

2. Turn Off All Phones
The last thing you want is to have the phone ring during a pivotal scene on Lost, so all guests but turn off their phones.  I don't mean put a cell phone on vibrate, I mean every single phone must be completely shut down, a land line must be completely disconnected, and there are absolutely NO laptops allowed.  Don't surf the Internet and get distracted, save that for after the episode.

3. The Show Starts Promptly at 8pm
Yes, the hour-long recap show at 8pm is just going to be things you and your friends already know, but I'd still recommend watching it so you can acclimate yourself to Lost.  During the first hour, it's also OK to talk amongst yourselves about how awesome the show and the characters are, and to have a heated debate about who the best character is.  But when the real show begins at 9pm, the lights go out and all of that changes.

4. You Do Not Talk During Lost
Once the actual season 6 premiere starts, shut the hell up.  Absolutely no one is allowed to talk during the episode, that's what commercials are for.  And yes, I realize that with DVRs you can start later and fast forward through the commercials, but you will need the commercial time to catch your breath and discuss how cool what you just saw was.

5. YOU DO NOT TALK DURING LOST!
This point needs to be emphasized.  Do not whisper your theory to the person sitting next to you.  And while you will occasionally feel the urge to cheer loudly, do it quietly and quickly and then shut up again.  I don't want to miss an important line of dialogue because you're gasp was so loud it stopped traffic.  Learn to control yourself.

6. Bathroom Breaks May Only Be Taken During Commercials
Even if you have a DVR, no one wants to sit waiting impatiently while someone else needs to take a bathroom break.  All bathroom breaks must be taken during the commercials, and if you're a little late coming back or there's a long line, tough.  You either need to hold it or do like the astronauts do and wear an adult diaper.  Lost waits for no bladder.

7. All Food and Drink Must Be Served with DHARMA Labels
If you plan on offering food and drink to your guests, do it in style by printing out some handy DHARMA labels and attaching them to every food item you have.  Here's a nice place to find and download all the labels you'll need.

8. Sit Quietly for 10 Seconds After It's Over
When the episode ends, we'll get the customary Lost title card with the accompanying "Bomp" sound.  When that happens, you should sit back and quietly reflect on what the heck just happened for 10 seconds.  Enjoy the Bad Robot logo and the preview for next week's episode.  After observing a moment of silence in honor of the greatness you just witnessed, you may speak loudly and gesticulate wildly to fully emphasize your love of Lost.


So follow these eight simple rules and you'll have a terrific Lost premiere party.



(Image courtesy of ABC)