'Gossip Girl' Recap: Bad Doctor, Stupid Daughter
'Gossip Girl' Recap: Bad Doctor, Stupid Daughter
Glenn Diaz
Glenn Diaz
Staff Writer, BuddyTV
It's just like the good old days when Dan and the rest of the Gossip Girl crew is united in Serena's (Blake Lively) daddy's plot. Meanwhile, Serena doesn't have a clue that he's lying.  In the process, the gang got to play a little bit of House, although they didn't exactly eliminate diagnosis after diagnosis.

'Gossip Girl' Photos from the Season 3 Finale

Chuck + Jenny = Apocalypse
Serena helps Blair (Leighton Meester) pick out something to wear for his date with Cameron, and in the process, she points out the inane narrowness of the Gossip Girl universe: "You've dated Chuck, and Nate, and Chuck, and Nate again."

And because Chuck (Ed Westwick) is bored with his own life, after helping Little J (Taylor Momsen) to snag Nate (Chace Crawford), he now tries to help her figure out what's up with Lily's (Kelly Rutherford) medication. Thanks to his pharmacist, he discovers that someone doesn't want Lily to get well, and now he needs to get Blair to find out who.

Wary of Chuck's intentions, Blair was all, "Who are you? House?" which is not an improvement from how she welcomed the unlikely duo: "You two here together. Please tell me there's an explanation that doesn't involve the apocalypse." B won't hear any of it, and Chuck's But-I'm-Chuck-Bass reasoning falls on deaf ears.

So Chuck and Jenny go to the psychiatrist without B.

Humphreys versus Van Der Woodsens
Meanwhile, it's a typical day over at the Humphreys'. They can't stand each other. On the other hand, Lily continues to seemingly fall for William, again. Unfortunately, these all fit snugly into Serena's Lily Plus William Minus Rufus Plan, and when Holland announces that she did sleep with Rufus, Serena gloats and pouts because she was right.

We hate it when that happens, rare as it is that Serena is right.

Then, Dan begins conspiring with Nate to find out what the deal is with Holland, which will totally annoy Serena. Apparently, Nate knows Serena's step-dad better than Serena. As if that wasn't enough, Nate and Dan got Blair to work with them. When they sit down to Google Holland, guess who they find? Chuck and Jenny. It's a party!

To entrap Holland, everyone is going to a benefit that night. Nate gives a jilted Cameron a Cliff Notes version of how they normally do things, and he seems OK with the idea.

In a not so surprising twist, Serena is going to the same benefit. So will her dad and Lily, who cannot contain her joy at receiving ... a juicer! As it turns out, Serena's childhood fantasy of a normal nuclear family is still alive.

At the benefit, the scheme quickly becomes another way for Chuck and Blair to confront their problems when they accost Holland and give her a rundown of the stuff they did to each other, which shocks even the psychiatrist.

Just when things are about to come to a head, Little J alerts William that everyone (except Serena) is on to his scheming with Holland, and if he wants to run, the time to do it is now. Soon things start to become clear, and Serena's dreams of a family reunited are dashed.

Jenny all too proudly announces that she tipped William off, and Rufus is pissed. So is Eric, who tells her that no one is forcing her to stay if she doesn't want to be part of the VDW's. So she heads to Nate's and spends the night there - sounds familiar? - while S is with Dan. Aren't these two step-siblings now?

"You can't Affair to Remember me!"
Finally, Chuck gives Blair an ultimatum: If she doesn't meet him on top of the Empire State Building, he'll "close his heart" to her forever. Blair will be there, of course. She has to be.

(Image courtesy of the CW)