In the Gossip Girl
finale, everyone just behaved horribly. Serena (Blake Lively) and Dan (Penn Badgley) kiss, Nate (Chace Crawford) pulls a "dick move" and Chuck (Ed Westwick) sleeps with Jenny (Taylor Momsen). OK, everyone except Blair (Leighton Meester), who remains the voice of reason throughout "Last Tango, Then Paris." You know something's up if B turns out to be the most upright character on Gossip Girl
Also: 'Gossip Girl' Season 3: Top 30 Moments
and Best and Worst Fashions of 'Gossip Girl' Season 3Chuck and Blair (and Jenny)
To stop herself from going to Empire State, Blair makes a very pregnant Dorota chaperone her on her date with Cameron. We found out that - gasp! - Dorota and Chuck are no longer friends on Facebook because of B. Nevertheless, Dorota finds the whole Affair to Remember
thing romantic, and she grimly asks B: Are you prepared to live a long Chuck-less life?
After seeing the Dan-Serena photo Little J sent to Gossip Girl, Blair goes over to give Little J a little "smackdown" - by telling her that nobody loves her. She runs into Dan and in the middle of lecturing him about signs ("They're for the religious, the superstitious and the lower-class"), she spies the Empire State Building in the distance and gets an epiphany.
BUT: just as she's about to go there to meet Chuck Bass, Dorota's water breaks. Thankfully, that is but a momentary interruption because Dorota, now with B's parents on the hospital, shoos her away. So in true rom-com cliffhanger fashion, she dashes out of there.
Long story short, Blair is late to ESB, Chuck leaves ESB, Jenny arrives and finds Chuck in his suite, Chuck and Jenny kiss and let's just say Chuck got something Damien didn't. A little nod (and the dirty finger) to season 1's attempted rape? You tell me. Also: Is it just me or did it sound like the gates of hell just opened when the two kissed?
And of course
Blair shows up with the peonies and an apology. Too bad for her, Little J is still in Chuck's room and is bound to make things infinitely more interesting. Or not, because she doesn't interrupt the happy couple and scurries out of there, only to break down in front of Eric.
Moments later, just when Chuck props up the ring and says something about the rest of his life, Dan shows up and hits him. He has his teary-eyed little sister in tow and Blair instantly figures it out. She gives Little J a serous tongue-lashing and a threat to leave and never return to Manhattan again. And ... Rufus shows up with bags of bagels.
Distraught, Chuck finds himself in some seedy faraway place and ends up shot by a couple of muggers because he doesn't want to part with the engagement ring. Can Gossip Girl
really afford to lose Chuck? Don't bet on it, but it'll be fun to see how they'd get themselves out of this one.Serena and Nate (and Jenny)
Jenny's on a roll. She punishes Dan and Serena for not locking the door after a presumed creepy, sort of incestuous tryst. "We just fell asleep!" Serena near-screams. We don't buy it, S. You are on your own with this one.
(And why is everyone
on Jenny's case? Granted, the girl had an ulterior motive, but if not for her, this "meaningless kiss" wouldn't have gotten out and Serena would've gotten away with doing something stupid again.)
When Nate and Serena finally medt, Serena assumes complete guilty behavior by being defensive and blaming everything on Nate. But because he's a pushover, he believes her when she claims that nothing happened. Nate should totally watch Lie to Me
. Serena is lying through her teeth.
At the hospital, however, where Dorota gave birth, Serena and Dan are dumb enough to talk about their secret indiscretion in public (dumb because Gossip Girl
is on a roll that day; first Georgina, then Dan and Serena).
Sure enough, Nate arrives and overhears what S just said. Instead of running off as he should have, he gives them a chance to explain and realizes that Dan does have feelings for Serena, who, not so surprisingly, is still clueless about the whole thing.
Dan and Serena have a little talk and ruminate on why their relationship (in season 1) was awesome. Just then, Dan gets a text from Vanessa, who is up to speed about the whole thing thanks to Nate. Everyone is just behaving horribly on this episode (Nate would refer to this later as a "dick move" - awesome language, Nathaniel).
After all the hoopla, Serena wants to "cleanse" and Blair wants to go to Paris. S points out that they have never been single together, and we agree: it is a bit disconcerting for their love lives to blow up at about the same time.
Nevertheless, the two head to Paris (with Dan hot on their trail), Jenny is sent away, Chuck is kind of dead and - the real shocker - Georgina reveals what had been under her coat the whole time: a baby bump that she says belongs to Dan.
(Image courtesy of the CW)