Next Tuesday's highly anticipated Glee/Britney Spears hour of power just got a little more highly anticipated: The full-length Britney covers have leaked!As an homage to Britney, all my grades (out of 5) are inspired by props in her original music video for each song.
I've combined my three favorite addictions (Glee, Britney Spears and judging) to bring to you my thoughts on the five big Brit covers coming our way on Tuesday. Listen to them all, critique along with me and continue looking even forward-er to Tuesday. See you then, Gleeks!
"... Baby One More Time"Performed by: Rachel (Lea Michele)
Not her best effort. Nothing about the music or the vocals is surprising or original. Lea always sounds great. But she had the opportunity to remind us why we all loved Britney's breakout hit in the first place, and instead this cover reminds us why it's been played out. I hope the visuals help distract from that during the episode.Grade: 2/5 puffy pink scrunchies
"Me Against the Music"Performed by: Brittany (Heather Morris) and Santana (Naya Rivera)
It's a good thing Dr. Carl obliges when Santana says
she and Brittany want to "get [their] anesthesia on." To be completely frank, this Britney/Madonna track never really hooked me when it came out in 2003. The lyrics were too fast and the music too frantic. It's still not my favorite in this version, but the chemistry between Brittany and Santana's sultry voices feels a lot more like alchemy than the Brit-Madonna match did.Grade: 3.5/5 gaps between Madonna's teeth"Stronger"Performed by Artie (Kevin McHale)
Artie's an interesting choice for this, my favorite Britney song (don't judge, it's for nostalgic reasons) given his inability to both drive a car or dance sexily with a chair
... no, still don't think it's going to happen. Even so, there's no question the themes of the song apply to his story arc, and that Artie's soulful male voice adds a whole new element to an otherwise straightforward cover. I still prefer the original, but this is a solid effort. And as I always say (now), the more "Stronger" on my iPod, the better.Grade: 3/5 shiny silver chairs.
"Toxic"Performed by: New Directions and Will Schuester
"Toxic," already criminally addictive in just Britney's hands, gets the full Glee
-ification treatment with the help of the whole club, resulting in the kind of cover I love best from them: The ones that walk that fine line between totally original and totally reverent. (See also: "Don't Stop Believin'.") Even with the awkwardness of Will busting out his sexy voice with a bunch of high schoolers singing about doing the dirty, there's no way
this is not going to be my first iTunes purchase come Wednesday morning. There's just. No. Way.Grade: 5/5 meetings of the Mile High ClubHow would YOU grade all the Britney covers? Which is your favorite?
(Image courtesy of Fox)