Previously on Flavor of Love 3: The women dressed up like “sexy” nurses. Sheryl Lee Ralph tried to talk some sense to these women, but Seezinz and Sinceer didn’t listen and fought like cats and dogs.

As this episode begins, Prancer is bugged about Ice being on the radio. The ladies get dolled up for their next challenge, though Myammee is late because of her extensive beauty regimen. They’re split into two teams, each one getting $1,000 to design a restaurant. It’s like Top Chef Boyyyyyeeeeee-ardee!

Grayvee and Rayna are the managers. Rayna goes for an up-scale restaurant with the dumb-ass name of Flavaz. Grayvee goes for Kharma, naming it after Flavor Flav’s youngest son. Both teams get a cell phone, and Ice uses it to call her radio station and give scoops on what’s happening. Shy wants to get a reindeer because she knows Flavor Flav loves them, but Rayna nixes the idea. Ice and Grayvee steal the idea and take the reindeer. Rayna keeps talking about how classy her design is, with giant Egyptian statues and other incredibly tacky crap.

Flavor Flav brings in a professional food critic to help judge. At Kharma, Thing 1 and Thing 2 serve as hostesses. It has the theme of New Orleans with Mardi Gras masks, except for the reindeer, but Flavor Flav loves it. Head chef Bunz offers up butter-friend wings and some shrimp, chicken and sausage gumbo. That actually sounds tasty as hell. The judge says it’s too salty.

Flavaz tries for class, and fails on every imaginable level. Myammee is the “servant” who brings some Hennessy as an appetizer. I think she meant server, and her lingerie is suspect for a family-friendly restaurant. Flav hates that the girls once again misspelled his name, because it should be Flavorz. Next she brings out the entrée, seafood pasta. Again, I love both those things, but the alfredo sauce is way too rich. Prancer comes out on roller skates with cheesecake. From The Cheesecake Factory. At the very least, one meal will taste good.

Sidenote: Which looks worse, the new film Never Back Down (aka, One Tree Hill meets Fight Club) or the new season of Dirt (aka one of the worst shows on TV)? I call it a tie.

The critic hated the food at Kharma, but loved the décor, taking time to talk about the reindeer. He thought the décor at Flavaz wasn’t really Flavor Flav’s style and the food was too rich, but he enjoyed his Hennessy. Kharma wins, and Grayvee gets the solo date.

Shy blows up over the reindeer. But Flavor Flav is more upset at the incorrect name, which was all Myammee’s doing. Flav and Grayvee go to Tony Roma’s for some ribs, and she confesses to loving pig’s feet after he raves about his love of pork.

Ice gets a phone call from her radio station and she gives them an interview about how she is using this to boost her career, and how she’s attracted to black men, but Flavor Flav is quite ugly. Wow.

Flav takes the winning team ice skating the next day. The girls are taught by “professional” Scott Stewart. He looks a bit old and overweight to be a good figure skater, and he doesn’t seem to be that good. He’s no Johnny Weir, that’s for damn sure. Flavor Flav goes to drop the kids off at the pool, and this gives Sinceer a chance to blow up at Bunz, saying her mom is dead. But Bunz’ mom actually has a severe brain injury, which isn’t cool.

Back at the mansion, Shy visits Flavor Flav and rats out all the fake girls like Rayna. Prancer gives him the scoop about Ice promoting herself on the radio. Ice denies it, but she’s honest about not necessarily having a connection to him.

Flavor of Love 3 Elimination Time! Sinceer is called down and Flavor Flav asks her to apologize to Bunz. She does and gets rewarded with a clock, though in a confessional, she admits, “F*** yo mama.” That’s the Sinceer I know and loathe. In the end, he eliminates Ice and Rayna. The first one makes total sense, but all Rayna did was not buy a reindeer. Myammee misspelled his damn name. Oh well, one out of two is pretty good for this show.

On the next episode of Flavor of Love 3: The girls go on a waterslide, then do a Flavorettes Celebrity Roast. Here’s a brief sampling: “She spends more money on DNA testing than she does on rent.” That’s pretty damn funny.

 

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