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It's that time of year, and we're wishing a very happy holiday season to Dexter Morgan and his pals. This year, some of them were naughty, some of them were nice, but we want to make sure all of them get something special in their stockings.
For Vince Masuka, America's most vulgar yet loyal forensics guy. This year, Vince continued to (unsuccessfully) come on to Deb and any other woman in his field of vision. Yet his painful need to be Dexter's friend makes him oddly (and we do mean "oddly") sympathetic. For Vince, we have a copy of "How to Win Friends and Influence People," plus a real-live girl.
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Angel Batista, sergeant and lover boy. Even though Angel got involved with his boss Maria--a big no-no--we still dig the big lug for his dedication, his painful honesty, and his unmistakable sartorial style. For Angel, we offer a new fedora and a "Kiss Me, I'm Cuban" coffee mug.
Maria Laguerta, blushing bride. This year, Maria put aside professional principles to fool around with one of her employees, and then sidestepped an internal affairs investigation by secretly marrying the guy. We admire her chutzpah, if not her judgment. For Maria, we have a copy of a business ethics textbook and a chip-and-dip dish.
Harry Morgan, guardian angel. As always, Harry tried to keep Dexter on the not-so-straight and not-so-narrow path of the code-following righteous serial killer. He didn't always succeed, but Harry's spectral heart was always in the right place. For Harry, we have a classic DVD collection, featuring Ghost,Ghost Story, and Ghostbusters, plus a copy of the collected episodes of "M*A*S*H" from 1974 to 1983, featuring the "real" Harry Morgan as sage advice-giver Col. Potter.
Joey Quinn, angry detective. This year, hound Joey fell for a honeytrap, sleeping with a Miami reporter who turned out to be a serial killer's daughter. He gave her information about an ongoing investigation, inadvertently contributing to the death of Frank Lundy. For Joey, we offer a relaxing massage and a cold, cold shower.
Debra Morgan, unlucky in love. In the bad-luck sweepstakes, Joey has nothing on Deb. She dated a serial killer who almost offed her and fell in love with a much-older FBI agent who was murdered by Joey's girlfriend. For Deb, we have a copy of "Smart Woman, Foolish Choices" and "When Bad Things Happen to Good People," plus an iPod pre-loaded with "Won't Get Fooled Again."
Dexter Morgan, code-breaker. Dexter hit the roughest of patches this year. First he violated the life rules laid down by his dad, which threw him off his game in a big way. Then the Trinity Killer made Dexter's wife Rita his last victim, leaving Dexter a single father. No question--2010 is going to be a rebuilding year. We want Dex to get his mojo pumping again, so we have a "My Dark Passenger Could Beat Up Your Dark Passenger" t-shirt, a gift card for the duct-tape-and-plastic-wrap aisle at Home Depot, plus a package of Huggies.
To all the folks at Dexter: We hope all your holiday wishes come true and 2010 looks brighter!
-Alison Stern-Dunyak, BuddyTV Fan Columnist
(Image courtesy of Showtime)