'The Real Housewives of New Jersey' Recap: The Flight of the Fabellini
'The Real Housewives of New Jersey' Recap: The Flight of the Fabellini
Finally, the Napa trip is over. No more RV hi-jinks. Melissa and Joe Gorga seem to agree that Caroline "ruined" the last day of that vacation. The first day of school is occurring for some of these youngsters, and I'm curious as to the timeline on this show. Are we a year in the past? Or is the editing team getting it together really quickly?

The Gorgas were too busy videotaping and getting ready to catch the bus for the first day. Melissa gets the car as the yellow bus rolls by. In front of Audriana, their youngest, Joe and Teresa talk about how "over" Caroline they are. It's slightly comical, with them sitting at that tiny child's table.

Teresa takes comfort in Joe and how they're staying together in spite of all those "rumors" that they're getting divorced and that he's cheating on her. It does seem like he might be cheating on her, though. She mentions that if she ever found out he was cheating they'd be DONE. Uhhhh...

In Normalsville, Kathy and Rich are preparing Victoria to look at colleges. Kathy gets emotional, and turns it against Rich, telling him that she'll have to wipe the tears off the floor after Victoria leaves.

Jacqueline visits Melissa, for a hilarious spread of a loaf of banana bread, surrounded by Milano cookies. Melissa confronts Jacqueline about her fake sleeping, and they agree that Teresa's toast was snub-y.

Meanwhile, Teresa visits Kathy with Audriana in tow. The things that girl hears. UNATTENDED. Kathy and Teresa are chatting, but I can't even concentrate on what they're saying as Audriana wanders around, turning on the stove.

Both duos discuss the argument on the last night of the California trip, and they mainly discuss Caroline. The whole thing bores me, except if Audriana is going to set Kathy's house on fire, or gas them.

Then, to mix it up, Melissa visits Caroline, who has a giant cork board set up with blue cards for her Sirius Radio special. It's basically an outline of Caroline's feelings on friendship. Melissa says it's not fair for Caroline to sit idly by and play the victim.

"Caroline, we're not in high school here," Melissa says. Indeed.

Teresa is launching Fabellini through a party now, and Melissa is watching the girls so they won't be UNATTENDED while Teresa gets ready or something. Meanwhile, Kathy and Rich take Victoria on a visit to University of Maryland. Snore. At least Rich harassed the tour guides. And Victoria was not sold on the shared dorm room.

The Manzos head in for their gig on Sirius Radio. Caroline continues along her "I'm just me and I'm happy with my life. I'm Caroline, so what?" schtick. She will not be attending this Fabellini launch party. Ugh.

The Fabellini has launched. Only "close friends and family" are invited, but it looks like a pretty packed house, and Jacqueline wasn't invited. Then, like a mob wife, Dina Manzo rolls up. She almost fell on her platform heels, and the Fabellini step and repeat backdrop fell down. "This is a bad omen," Dina says.

On Caroline's radio show, no one called and it was awkward. Later, they got a couple calls and Caroline gave them vague answers.

Teresa and Dina have a chat, about Caroline, and Teresa tells Dina that Caroline told her she didn't want to be friends anymore because of what she wrote in the cookbook. I don't think Teresa has a very firm grasp on reality. Dina, through Teresa's lens, validates how she feels, and this just takes Teresa further and further from Oz in that hot air balloon of mistaken thinking.

Oh god, next week is the Posh Fashion Show! All the shit goes down at that thing!

(images courtesy of Bravo)

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