'Bones' Fan Columnist: Something Sinister is Afoot
'Bones' Fan Columnist: Something Sinister is Afoot
Nicole Bessette
Nicole Bessette
Contributing Writer, BuddyTV
Welcome back, Bones fans! After yet another painfully long absence, Bones returned last night with an all-new episode, "The Feet on the Beach," in which Booth and Brennan are called to investigate an apparent murder after several pairs of feet wash up along the U.S. and Canada border.

As always, the incredibly talented crew at Bones who create the bodies is to be commended for the excellent and very realistic job they do week in and week out, but I think that this episode really takes the cake. I mean, did you see all of those decomposing bodies at the body farm? So gross!

But now, let's not waste any more time. I'm sure you're all anxious to share your thoughts on this episode and the return of our beloved show, so for those of you who caught the episode last night, let's get recapping!

Those Aren't Your Feet

When you literally stumble upon a pair of decomposing feet, who do you call? That's right -- Booth and Brennan, of course.

But what happens when there are seven pairs of feet? Well, then you call in a forensic podiatrist from Canada, and in this case, we are introduced to Dr. Douglas Filmore.

Because some of the pairs of feet are technically in the United States and others are technically in Canada, Brennan invites Dr. Filmore to work with her and the Jeffersonian so that she can closely examine all the pairs of feet. Very clever, Brennan!

Once she does this, Brennan comes to the realization that the pairs of feet came from the University of Hogansburg body farm, and Angela confirms this deducing that a storm that occurred 8 days earlier had washed the feet into the river near the university.

Now, given that one of the pairs of feet does not belong to any of the research corpses used by the university, the Squints have their evidence of murder.

Meanwhile, the mild-mannered Dr. Filmore proves himself to be quite useful, and in working in accordance with Angela, helps to identify the victim as Dylan McEllroy, a college student with a particular affinity for limited-edition shoes. As it turns out, the serial number in his shoes led to this discovery.

Upon paying a visit to Dylan's roommate, Booth and Brennan learn that he was dealing drugs in order to offset the outrageous cost of all of his shoes, and, perhaps most surprisingly, he was growing his marijuana at the Hoganburg University body farm.

After finding the weed he was growing, Brennan realizes that the professor at the body farm, Professor Simpkins, must have known more than he originally let on, given that Dylan's marijuana, a plant that can so easily affect the decomposition of the bodies, went unnoticed by him.

And sure enough, after questioning him, he confesses that he and Dylan had an arrangement in which the student was allowed to grow his weed there. Yet this still does not explain why or how he was killed.

Of course, Hodgins is able to shed some light on the situation, as is Dr. Filmore when he says that whoever killed Dylan covered his body in a gel that makes insects come from miles around, which is significant because it means that the killer was intentionally trying to speed up the decomposition, thereby obscuring the time of death.

Given that only one person has an alibi for the time of Dylan's death, this confirms that Norman Hayes, a PhD fellow at Hoganburg, is their killer because he evidently knew he would need it.

Norman was working on his thesis at the body farm in which he needed the soil to be barren, but Dylan's weed was ruining that as it had grown over his remains. Having taken out $60,000 in student loans, he was outraged at the prospect of coming so close and failing, so in an act of rage, he got the lawnmower to cut all of Dylan's weed down.

Dylan, of course, tried to stop him, but Norman would have none of it as he angrily told Dylan to move. However, he didn't move, and Norman ended up accidentally killing him by severing his legs with the blades of the lawnmower. Ouch!

A Mother's Dilemma

Remember when Michelle told Cam she was going to follow her boyfriend to community college in Maine? And do you also remember when Cam filled out some college applications for Michelle without her knowledge?

Well, in last night's episode, we got to see the repercussions of that, as Cam was able to get Michelle accepted to Columbia University, but then was torn about what to do.

Sure, she got the oh-so-hilarious disapproving look from Hodgins and a talking-to from Sweets, but isn't that her job as a mom? Isn't she supposed to be looking out for Michelle's best interests?

Fortunately for Cam, things start to look up when Michelle tells her she has broken up with her boyfriend and can no longer go to the same college as him, but still, she feels badly and confesses to Michelle what she has done.

Although Columbia is one of the best universities in the country, Michelle wants to get in on her own, so she tears the acceptance letter in half and announces to Cam that she will take a year off and work to make money before reapplying. She doesn't want to take any shortcuts, and she wants to make Cam proud. Is that not the sweetest thing ever?

The Canadian

In accordance with the typical view of Canadians, Dr. Filmore, a forensic podiatrist, is very polite and considerate and desperately avoids confrontation with people.

In fact, it is this very quality that keeps him from saying something to Brennan until the very end of the episode.

You see, Brennan refuses to accept his field of study as legitimate and makes this opinion resoundingly clear in an article she writes. Or, as Sweets puts it, she has undermined the man's entire life's work.

To quote Brennan's article, Dr. Filmore says that he is merely an expert in one quarter of the bones of the human body which makes him one quarter of the expert Brennan is. Super harsh, right?

Clearly Brennan's words have had a big effect on Dr. Filmore as he is unable to move his right arm, and Sweets deduces that this is an example of conversion disorder in which Dr. Filmore has converted an issue he can't deal with emotionally into a physical symptom.

But what's the cure for this? Why, to tell off Dr. Brennan, of course. No pressure or anything.

Finally though, not being able to stand it any longer, Dr. Filmore does confront her, and suddenly, as if by a miracle, he can move his arm again. Although, I think at that point, Dr. Filmore is more concerned with his head, thanks to Sweets, who threw an object at him to see if he could catch it and ended up hitting him on the forehead. Oh, Sweets!

Brennan is Contrite

Although she adamantly objects to apologizing to Dr. Filmore for the majority of the episode, Brennan eventually relents because of Booth.

In a ridiculously sweet manner, Booth tells Brennan that he knows the kind of person that she is, but that she should also let other people in on that secret too.

So, Brennan says to Dr. Filmore that, although she doesn't believe that forensic podiatry should be recognized as its own separate specialty, she regrettably failed to have noted his remarkable skill and expertise and confesses that they might not have solved the case if it hadn't been for his help.

Finally, she confesses to being very grateful, and I too must say that I am very grateful to the Bones writers for giving us so much growth in Brennan's character recently. She really is becoming a changed person, and in this regard, I continue to have high hopes for the season finale and for a real Booth and Brennan relationship.

Also, I would like to take this time to congratulate the lovely Emily Deschanel on her own amazing relationship news: she and husband, David Hornsby, are expecting their first child. That child is certainly going to have one amazing mother!

Next Week's Episode

No need to worry, my friends. There will not be any more breaks to endure, and Bones will conclude the remainder of its sixth season with consecutive all-new episodes.

Next week, in particular, Booth and Brennan take a turn for the supernatural as they investigate the murder of a myth buster who appears to have been killed by the legendary Chupacabra.

Check out the promo below, and as always, hit the comments with your thoughts on this week's episode!

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(Image and video courtesy of FOX)