The sexy singles of Bachelor in Paradise have survived Week One! Well, most of them have, anyway.

We now know that the only way to stay in the game (and in “Paradise”) is to be coupled up with someone at the end of each week.

This means that everyone was scrambling to either make romantic connections or just form strategic partnerships in the hopes that a legitimate potential mate might arrive next week.

You know, like Chris Bukowski or Brooks Forester. Because when I think of potential mates, I definitely think of those two weirdos.

Bachelor in Paradise Premiere Recap: Is There Love at First Sight?>>>

Here are the rankings of the couples after Week One, from strongest to weakest…

1. Dylan and Elise

Elise locked in on Dylan pretty much immediately. She gushed about him to all the girls. By the first night, they were already making out in the ocean. Elise even said that she already wants to tell Dylan she loves him. Neither has spoken a peep about having interest in anyone else there, so … are these two the real deal?

2. Marquel and Michelle

Marquel and Michelle are both two peas in a pod. Both are confident and outgoing, plus they’re not too bad to look at. I can definitely see these two having a relationship. All Marquel has to do is MAKE A FREAKIN’ MOVE, a kind of important step that he failed to do with Andi on The Bachelorette.

3. Graham and AshLee

Well, we know that AshLee’s not going to ditch Graham. So there is definite lasting potential for this couple, as long as AshLee can keep her shit together and pretend that she’s not a psycho lovesick drama queen. (Which she is.) I doubt Graham will be uncoupling with her anytime in the near future, either. He’s too frightened of what would happen if he did.

4. Marcus and Lacy

As far as Marcus is concerned, Lacy’s the girl for him. And as far as Lacy’s concerned, Marcus is the guy for her. As is Robert. Going into the Week One rose ceremony, Lacy had placed all her chips on Robert. They had a fabulous date and lots of steamy makeout sessions. Plus, Robert was way into her, too. But then Marcus was up first and gave Lacy his rose, and Lacy was all, “Robert who?” Definite breakup potential for these two, but only if Lacy pulls the trigger. Marcus is already practicing his proposal speech. 

Meet the Cast of Bachelor in Paradise>>>

5. Ben and Sarah

There’s no romantic connection between Ben and Sarah, because this coupling was just a strategic move so Sarah could stay in the game. I was surprised, though, because I thought Ben would pick Daniella. Since Ben and Sarah (so far) don’t seem to have clicked with anyone in a mutual way (Sarah liked Marcus but it wasn’t reciprocated), maybe these two will just keep partnering up to stay in the game. I’m assuming there’s a monetary prize at the end, in addition to the long-lasting love of your partner? Let’s hope so.

6. Robert and Clare

Another strategic couple that only came about because Marcus gave out his rose first, and Robert had to pick a second choice. Clare and Robert did share a fun date, but it didn’t seem very romantic. I guess there’s always the possibility that real feelings could grow between these two, but I doubt it. Robert seems to be a guy in high demand in Paradise, so I’m betting this couple will be dead on arrival in Week Two.

Bachelor in Paradise airs Monday nights at 8pm on ABC.

(Image courtesy of ABC)

Lindsay Podolak

Contributing Writer, BuddyTV