I fear I may grow weary of this season of America's Next Top Model
now that it's trying so hard to be America's Next Top Celebrity For No Reason
. And that's not even an insult. Tyra literally said it herself on last night's episode
: Their goal for the all-stars is to turn 15 minutes of reality TV fame into a career. And the way to do that, apparently, is not to accumulate actual skills, but to become a walking, one-word "brand." So the weird irony of this Top Model
season is that to win, you need to be the best at getting attention and being remembered for doing nothing ... but then, after
you win, they give you a bunch of stuff to do! (Like pose for Express, talk to celebs on Extra
, etc.) "Congratulations on being so good at not having a job. Here, have some jobs."
So I guess it's perfectly fitting that this is part of the episode description for episode 3 of All-Stars
: "The competition is fierce as the All-Stars meet reality star Kristin
Cavallari, who tells them what it takes to be a celebrity
personality in Hollywood."
She's the perfect person to tell them how to be a celebrity personality in Hollywood! She's been pretending that having no job was a job foreeeeever!Watch a preview for the episode, which also has the models chatting with Mario Lopez (definitely haven't seen enough of THAT GUY lately or ever!) and then posing on stilts (because a big part of being famous is doing dramatic things that might make you fall over):
Loving flavor. Being strange. Having a face. Word vomit. "Peace, love and granola." With the exception of that last one, please allow me to say it... "All-Stars! They're Just Like US!"
(Image courtesy of CW)