'America's Got Talent' Completes the Top 16
'America's Got Talent' Completes the Top 16
After the obligatory judge banter, Nick Cannon brings out the first group of three: Doogie Horner, MURRAY, and Mary Ellen.  Tonight will be a test of faith, because there is no God if Mary Ellen moves on. This one is obvious, MURRAY moves on, and graciously helps Mary Ellen find her way off stage (awkward). 

After a performance from Taio Cruz, we see the second group, containing Taylor Mathews, NU Covenant, and Lindsay Stirling.  This one is also an obvious choice, but I'm sad because I thought these acts were all sort of mediocre so it means one of my favorite acts won't make it through. Unsurprisingly, Taylor Mathews moves on and increases my excitement for some Taylor Mathews-Debra Romer babies. But we will never really know what age Lindsay Stirling is.  My guess is anywhere between 18 and 27, but that all depends on how far Mormon Cryogenic technology has advanced.

The third group contains Prince Poppycock, NU Covenant, and Strikers All Stars. If Strikers All Stars hadn't been so mediocre last night, this one might not be obvious but America loves Prince Poppycock (whose name is not naughty even partially, it's an old-timey word for "nonsense!" or a brand of flavored popcorn). Prince Poppycock for the win!

Then Brett Michaels performed and I'm not even going to pretend like I didn't fast-forward because the final group contained Rudi Macaggi, ArcAttack, and Anna and Patryck.  I can't even fathom how ArcAttack wasn't in the top three, I thought they were so great.  In an even more unfathomable turn of events, Rudi Macaggi wasn't even in the top five! What?! If the child ballroom dancing act goes through I'll eat my hat. Fortunately, after what seemed like an hour of judge rambling, my hat will go uneaten as ArcAttack moves into the Top 16.

What do you think of the results? Were you disappointed? What about that crazy-fun Orville Redenbacher green room sequence? Or the super-long in-show advertisement for The Other Guys?  Are you excited for the YouTube acts next week?

(image courtesy of NBC)