In our least favorite rumor of 2010, word on the web is Howard Stern might replace Simon Cowell on American Ido
l. There are about, oh
lets see, 6 billion people we'd rather see replace Simon than Howard
Stern. And I'm pretty sure the censors at FOX feel the same way.
Since 6 billion is a pretty hefty list, we've narrowed it down to five
folks we'd much rather see take Simon's place at the judge's table than America's most notorious shock jock.
5. General Larry Platt
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No matter who wins season 9 of American Idol
, I fear that the only
person we'll remember in five years is General Larry Platt. FOX should
capitalize on Larry Platt's success, and the fact he's too old to
compete on Idol
, by opening up a seat at the judge's table for General.
I already have visions of an all "Pants on the Ground" themed week
dancing through my head.4. Conan O'Brien
TV's hottest free agent is already in talks with FOX, so they might as
well kill two birds with one stone and bring CoCo to Idol
.3. The Worst of the Celebrity Guest Judges: Joe Jonas
Even the nearly mute Joe Jonas would be a preferable replacement for Simon Cowell if Howard Stern is an option. Sure, Joe didn't say much, but he looked pretty and didn't
require a 30 second delay from the censors. Plus, Joe's intimate
knowledge of the oh-so-desirable Tween market make the possibility of
him as an Idol
judge more than a punch line.2. Ryan SeacrestNo joke here. No one knows Idol better than Ryan Seacrest and as a radio host, he has a keen understanding of what it takes to top the charts. If Idol wants a disc-jockey to join the judge's table, it should be Seacrest or no one else. 1. Seth MacFarlane as Stewie GriffinHe's evil. He has a British accent. Oh my
god, he's Simon Cowell in animated form. The problem is, he is
animated. But we have the perfect solution for that. FOX has already
proven they're willing to let Seth MacFarlane to do just about
anything, so set up Seth in a life-sized Stewie costume, sit him at the
judges table and let the new king of nasty reign.
Who would you like to see replace Simon Cowell on American Idol instead of Howard Stern?