"Singers" to Forget
comes out with all the goods on display. She's got a spiked bra pushing
up the ladies to go with some fierce beaded heels. Nicki nicknames her
"Omi," but I'd call her Spiky McBouncyBoobs. She butchers Aretha
Franklin's "Respect," and she and her out-in-the-open companions are
sent on their merry way.
is just a weird guy who says where he's from twice in the same sentence
and claims to have the uncanny ability to sing while lying down with
perfect clarity. He laughs like Louis from "Revenge of the Nerds," and
he tells Nicki she looks like cotton candy. He sings "Feeling Good" by
Michael "Bluble," Randy says "never," and Joel heads right over to the
TBS set to audition as a contestant for King of the Nerds.
and his cowboy hat pace around the stage doing bad Brad Paisley
karaoke, complete with expressive hand gestures. For good measure, he
dances and does a model strut before his two minutes of fame are over.
Gotta love the audition rounds. Or not.
Just from the dunce music they play during Brad Harris'
introduction, complete with the ride 'em horsey dance moves, it's clear
he's going to be horrible. He used to rap under the name Bakon
(pronounced Bay-Con), so naturally he is singing "A Whole New World,"
from Aladdin. Enough said. I like how the judges refuse to shake his
In the End
all, 37 singers are moving on to Hollywood from North Carolina. One
highlight was definitely the appearance of season 10 winner Scotty
McCreery and his ever-present awkwardness. He chats with fans, and it's a
reminder how not-American Idol-like he was in the beginning. And
now he's a country music superstar (who still played baseball for his
high school team after winning).
nearly as much emphasis on the nicknames Nicki Minaj gave to
contestants, which included Collared Green, Lady Bug, Honey Pie, Top Hat
and Booby. Anything is better than focusing on her fake British
Despite the show's best effort, the
judges actually did NOT overshadow the performers. The best part of it
all is that we only had to listen to seven or eight horrible singers,
only four of whom were featured. Also, the rejected were much nicer than
in Chicago, with zero profanity coming from the contestants. That was
all reserved for Nicki.
In other pleasant American Idol
news, Thursday's trip to Randy's hometown of Baton Rouge is only an
hour long. Maybe the talent was lacking, but it's probably that Fox
REALLY wanted to clear the way for the return of "Glee." Either way,
something tells me we'll get the same level of enjoyment out of one hour
of auditions as we would from two. It's like Daylight Savings Time, but
without the extra hour of drinking before last call.<< Page 1: Singers to Remember in Charlotte
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