Nausea is a completely reasonable response to American Idol
results night, right? Because after last Thursday's shocking massacre
, I have to admit I feel a wee bit queasy going in to tonight's eliminations. To ease the possible heart break of losing another favorite this week, I'm trying to take the Rolling Stones' advice and go in to the evening with "No Expectations." No expectations that the best singer won't be eliminated, no expectations that I won't hate Ke$ha even more after her performance and no expectations that the power of the Worsters will have worn off.
Follow along with my live thoughts tonight as we see if who will be eliminated and who will live to sing another week. We have some thoughts on who'll be sent packing
, as does our Idol expert Anoop Desai
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Before we get into the eliminations, let's talk a little bit about last night, shall we? Did American Idol completely ruin the Rolling Stones for you or only sort of? Who did you think handled the theme the best? The worst? My ranking's of last night's performances were surprisingly controversial.
By the sound of the dramatic opera music in the intro, I'm not watching American Idol,
I'm about to watch some battle to the death gladiator brawl. Please oh please say it's between Simon and Ryan. That tension has to go somewhere one day right? (Hopefully not into more strange stand offs or homoerotic jokes.) Oh no, even Simon calls out Ryan for the little incident last night and somehow, it's more awkward than any other Simon or Ryan interaction.
Remember America, starting tonight the "Judges' Save" will be reinstated. That means any time until the Top 5, the judges can save a single contestant as long as their vote is unanimous. Too bad they didn't have it last week, where both Lilly Scott and Alex Lambert would be worthy uses. Guest Performer of The Night #1 - David Cook
Starting off the night is season 7's winner David Cook with a rocking renditions of The Rolling Stones "Jumpin' Jack Flash," which makes me feel even sadder about last night's limp attempt at The Rolling Stones. Seriously, we saw 12 performances of Rolling Stones songs last night and only one even mildly rocked. (Thank God for Casey James.) That David Cook is genuinely rocking out, is like Salt (of the Earth) in an open wound.
It's time to find out who'll be in the first bottom three of the season, but not before this season's Ford "Music Video." Which involves white outfits that look like stylized strait jackets, balloons filled with paint and a fleet of Ford Fiestas. And that is all the free advertising that Ford Motor Company is going to get from me.
And on to the Results:
Paige Miles - BOTTOM THREE
(not super surprising, I said in my performance ranking it was Paige's best but it may have been too little, too late.) Lee Dewyze - SAFE (hopefully this means he finally won't do some dbag acoustic sexy-time song next week) Siobhan Magnus - SAFE (America loves a quirky girl, for now...and hopefully for good)
Aaron Kelly - SAFE (hopefully this means more Kelly Kelly next week)
For the next spot in the Bottom 3 it's between Andrew Garcia and Tim Urban. Neither one of these guys would surprise me in the Bottom 3 or for elimination. Andrew Garcia - SAFE
(Wow. Who knew that "Straight Up Now Tell Me" was so frigging popular) Tim Urban - BOTTOM THREE
(Take that Worsters...though we'll see if he leaves.)TO THE RESULTS, EVENTUALLY >>