This is what I knew about the Top 12 Guys prior to last night's American Idol
1) The American Idol
producers love David Archuleta
2) David Cook
can sing rock n' roll.
3) Michael Johns
is a favorite to win it all.
4) Danny Noriega
has a nice voice, but makes Elton John look like Bruce Springsteen.
5) Robbie Carrico
used to be a boy band member, and no matter how much he dresses like Kurt Cobain, he'll never live his Boy Band days down.
And that's about it. Last night's American Idol
was our first extended look at most of the top 12 guys and the results were as expected: abundant mediocrity, some pleasant surprises, and a few disasters. In a new feature here at BuddyTV, we're going to take a look at who will most likely be sent home by America on Thursday's elimination episode of American Idol
Ranking the Top 12 Male Performances
Top12 Men Live Thoughts
Who Will Go Home:
Garrett's presence in the top 12 is inexcusable. We saw none of his auditions, and I'm glad. First off, his whole look kind of disgusted me. The long, curly hair straight out of a Poison album cover was one thing, but the mustache was another. I was watching in HD, so not everyone may have picked up on it, but Garrett had the most disturbing (and absolutely deliberate) teenstache I've ever seen on prime time TV. You may wonder: why am I wasting space with talk of teenstaches? Because Garret's performance was that boring. He was clearly scared and gave the worst performance of the night.
Although I don't think it was one of the two worst performances of the night, it was the least relatable. Out of all the available songs from the sixties, Jason picked one that I can imagine middle-aged couples slow dancing to in a casino lounge. With Jason's outlandish smile, this was the cheesiest performance of the night. I don't know who is going to vote for him. Maybe sentimental older women.
– Not sure how America will react to the butchering of an Elvis song.
Danny Noriega – Ditto
– Awful song choice. I'm not ready to give up on Menard yet. Let's see one more performance. Also, he's too handsome to be voted off the first week.
Chikezie Eze – Terrible performance of a great song. The orange suit was even worse. But, I don't think America is ready to get rid of the Token Black Guy just yet.
Oscar's Top 12 Guys Performance Rankings:
#1 - Jason Castro
– “Daydream” by Lovin' Spoonful
#2 - David Cook – “Happy Together” by The Turtles
#3 - Michael Johns – “Light My Fire” by The Doors
#4 - Robbie Carrico “One” by Three Dog Night (originally by Harry Nilsson)
#5 - David Hernandez
– “In the Midnight Hour” by Wilson Pickett
#6 - David Archuleta – “Shop Around” by The Miracles
#7 - Danny Noriega – “Jailhouse Rock” by Elvis Presley
#8 - Luke Menard – “Everybody's Talkin'” by Harry Nilsson
#9 - Colton Berry – “Suspicious Minds” by Elvis Presley
#10 - Jason Yeager – “Moon River” originally from Breakfast at Tiffany's
#11 - Chikezie Eze
– “I Love You More Today Than Yesterday” by Stevie Wonder
#12 - Garrett Haley – “Breaking Up is Hard to Do” by Neil Sedaka
-Oscar Dahl, BuddyTV Senior Writer
(Image Courtesy of FOX)