'American Idol' Live Results: A Big Shock on Motown Week
'American Idol' Live Results: A Big Shock on Motown Week
This week the Top 11 faced Classic Motown head on and the results were mostly positive. While it was a good show overall, someone must go home this week, and I think it will probably be another girl. A lot of the guys did incredibly well, with or without guitars, and you know what? The girls did well, too! As much as I love a train wreck, I don't think we've had one yet. You may disagree with me!

So who will go home tonight? It will definitely be someone, unless there's an upset and the judges use The Save, in which case it will be no one. I've got all the facts right here, folks.

I used to hate the results shows, but I have slowly come to love them. They're so over-dramatic and preposterous. Speaking of preposterous, did you hear that the Idols have moved out of their Beverly Hills mansion because it may be haunted? It sounds like there were some other problems, too, according to TMZ, but they saw a sheet lift off a bed and float down the stairs! I would like to see a clip package about that instead of the Ford Music Video.

Despite America's 30 million votes, Ryan will still make you feel guilty. Also, the results "may shock you." How does Ryan know that? I don't have time to wonder; I'm too busy feeling guilty in advance for not voting for whomever goes home and doesn't get to go on tour.

To help the contestants with their pitch problems and trouble hearing themselves, they brought in Marc Anthony. And they were all like, "Great, is he also a sound tech?" He scares me. Marc watched the show with his Idols, and SOMETIMES DISAGREED with his wife! He really wants the contestants to like him, and he wasn't doing anything else this week except buying more summer scarves.

Finally, the group performance. I do believe they're singing live again, since they didn't sound eerily on-pitch, at least until they got to the chorus. It was an interesting performance because some people I remember liking sounded not so great, and some people who have gotten bad feedback sounded better than they normally do. I was missing Scotty McCreery, when all of a sudden they wheeled Stevie Wonder out on a piano platform. It was magical. Then it was Steven Tyler's birthday and there was a cake and singing and a psychadelic portrait. Like Steven, I was rendered speechless.

Ryan promises us surprising results yet again, but first the Ford music video. They wore raincoats and made everything eco-friendly, which is to say they made trees out of bottles and cardboard. They can put that music video right in there with the rest of that garbage as far as I'm concerned.

Kieron dimmed the lights without being told, and Lauren, Scotty and Pia were sent to center stage. Lauren is looking like a child beauty queen again (but with cleavage -- agh). Ryan tells them they'll all be packing their bags ... to go on tour this summer!! Like he was going to send them all home?

"Did your heart stop for a second?" Ryan asks, needing an increasing amount of validation.

Then Sugarland performed "Stuck Like Glue" and I don't have much to say about it in the realm of snark. I liked them and enjoyed the performance, and no one had to enjoy it from the stools.

Then we had to find out about how much James and Paul like entertainment wrestling. They exhibited their enjoyment in the Idol mansion and I could see how that might disturb the spirits.

James and Paul were called to center stage and Ryan told them, "You're not safe tonight." The audience booed, and Ryan said, "You're REALLY not safe," and then "Eye of the Tiger" started playing and Hulk Hogan came out for no reason to tell James and Paul that they ARE, in fact, safe. I wish I was kidding. Then Hulk Hogan pushed Ryan into the audience and ripped his shirt off. Yay! Am I dreaming this episode? It feels like I'm dreaming this.

Jacob, Thia and Stefano are next up and I wonder who will come out for THEM? Nobody. But Jacob is safe. Thia is in the bottom three, along with Stefano. The audience boos, and Gordon Ramsay is still insulting Stefano's mom's pasta. So far I'm not totally surprised. Where's this shock Ryan promised?

Casey, Haley and Naima come to the stage next. One of them is in the bottom three. Naima is safe (woo hoo! She stepped it up last night). Haley has been in the bottom three the last two weeks, Casey has never been in the bottom, but of course Ryan told us we'd be shocked so I was NOT surprised to hear that Casey is in the bottom three. Ryan has no sense of drama.

Jennifer Hudson, you guys! I love her, she looks great, and I love that she's not even watching American Idol because she's too busy being fabulous. If this is what sixth place looks like, complete with an Academy Award, then the outlook is bright for the couched contestants.

Another surprise is in store for us: Thia Megia is safe and moves back to the couches. Say what? Did Ryan just do that to keep our attention away from how much taller than him Jennifer Hudson is? If the judges use The Save, will the Top 11 go on tour? Probably.

I love an upset! American Idol gave us one, too, because Casey is in the bottom and at risk for elimination. This must mean the judges will seriously consider using The Save.
The night kept getting weirder and weirder, as Casey starts singing the song he auditioned with and the cameras cut to Haley smile-crying. Randy stopped Casey mid-performance and was like, "We know who you are; we don't need to listen to you sing."

They declared that they would be using The Save, all casually, and Casey shook and dropped to his knees. He went right up to the judges' table, asking them, "Are you serious?" It was really sweet. Casey's safe!

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SO, two people go home next week and all Top 11 will go on tour!

Were you shocked? Were you moved? Would the judges have used the save if it was Stefano?

(Image courtesy of FOX)