Tonight American Idol
and Posh Spice join the mile high club (of sorts)
as the Idol
auditions make their final stop in Denver, Colorado.
Hopefully, the high altitude and lack of oxygen makes the judges,
especially Victoria Beckham, a little kicky or punch drunk. While she
said more than Joe Jonas, Posh's Idol
debut was a bit of a robot snooze fest.
Hopefully her return trip to the judges' table provides more insight
from The Posh One. Or at least some of her classic Posh "oh no you didn't biatch" face.
Look, she's demonstrating it right there on the judges panel. It
appears to be her signature look. Seriously, I was looking for old
Spice Girl photos (I know, you're jealous
) and Posh doesn't
smile in a single one. This is about as close to a smile as I could find:
Surrounded by smiles and peace signs, Posh remains stoic. The same could be said for her initial Idol
auditions. Let's keep our fingers crossed America, that at least one auditioner makes her smile, for all our sakes.
Watch along with me tonight as we learn the last batch of auditioners heading to Hollywood, if Victoria Beckham is in fact a robot, and who is cursed with Randy's 100 billion percent yes! Mark Labriola
Mark was dealing with celebrity doppleganger week long before it was the latest Facebook trend, because everyone says he he looks like Jack Black. And I would bet money if you found his facebook, his photo would be Jack Black this week. Or maybe something like this:
Which makes me worried this whole audition is going to be a joke. Thankfully, Mark doesn't sing like Jack Black and this audition isn't Tenacious D, rather Mark has a surprisingly high falsetto and he sings with sincerity. It wasn't the strongest vocal, but it was unique, not a Jack Black joke, which the judges and I are appreciative of. He gets four yeses.
Official Spice Girl Rating: "Do It"
Mario: Mr. Nervous Laugh, ahaha
Ahahaha. Mario has a severe case of nervous laughter, which the judges mock him for. Ahaha. I am mocking him for his gigantic green trench coat and straight up copy of Elvis' snarl for Jail House Rock. Ahaha. It wasn't terrible, but if you're going to do an iconic song, by the biggest of Icons, adding your own spin or doing it pitch perfect is the only way to succeed. Ahaha. Mario did neither. Ahahaha.
Official Spice Girl Rating: "Something Kinda Funny"
Kimberley looks creepily like Brittany Murphy in a bad wig:
By which I strangely mean, she has the perfect look for Idol. She sings an Ingrid Michaelson song and addresses a line about Rogaine to Simon, which gets more of a reaction from the judges than her singing. And please oh please Simon call her out on the wig and that the amount of hair on your chest suggest Rogaine will never be needed. Simon says she's very lippy, but very funny, and gets four yeses. And the stamp of "you look like trouble from Simon," which we adults call flirting. As soon as she's out of the room, Simon addresses the
wig in the room. Official Spice Girl Rating: "Lady is a Vamp" (in a wig)
MORE MILE HIGH >>